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T.A.R. Sunday, December 4th, 2005
The accuracy of this review is disputed. Please see discussion below.
Period of
Field Use:
Just once
Date There: December 3rd, 2005
3 months
Other Fields
in the Area:
PEVS@AG ==> ridiculously better
Review: Ok, so I had played a couple of times at pevs, which is practically next door, but wanted to try something new. This was my first time as a walk-on, but I found that everyone there was very friendly, and immediately struck up a conversation with a couple of dudes in the Army. They were guards for the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier at Arlington National Cemetery. Why am I telling you this? Because that was the highlight of my day of paintball.

First up, the website says that things start at 10:00. This is an outright lie. Safety briefing didn't even start until 10:45. After half-an hour of being talked to like an autistic 3 year old during the briefing. We didn't head up to the fields until 11:15. And that is when things really went downhill.

They semi-randomly assigned teams, but the ref didn't care if people stayed together in groups. Ended up that blue team ended up with all of the adults that had their own markers. Three guys had identical Angels, and seemed to play together all the time. One other guy had a $2,000 DM5 (I think that is what it was called, all the refs were drooling over it). I was on red with the 3 Army dudes (we all had rentals), and 9 kids between the ages of 10 and 12. Some of the kids had pretty good markers, but as soon as soon as the whistle blew, they huddled next to our flag, and were summarily slaughtered.

After 6 matches, red was losing 1-5, and the blue team had added late comers until the tally was 20 blue, 14 red. Only win came as Army dudes pulled off a brilliant flanking maneuver and caught blue sleeping. During these 6 rounds, my rental marker was operational for 3. I figured, hey, its cold, its a rental marker, I was still having an okay time, so I'd stick it out for the afternoon.

We broke for lunch, and after 3 post lunch rounds, my marker had failed in all three, even after I had switched it out for a new one. When it did actually fire, it chopped paint on every other shot, and was so weak that I had an operational range of about 35 feet. Numerous times a player would be 50-60 feet away and all I could do was lob shots at him in a high arc, and if I did hit him all I got was a bounce.

After the third round, I got pissed off, walked back to base camp, and demanded a refund. The manager tried to tell me that if I wanted a refund I would have to give him back the extra 1000 rounds I had purchased, and then he would refund 30 of my 45 bucks. I told him to go to hell, and ended up getting 30 of my 45 back and keeping my 1000 rounds (which I didn't use because my marker didn't work).

With PEVS so close, it makes no sense to me why anyone would actually go to this field. I could not imagine a worse paintball experience.

People (other walk-ons) are nice.
Fairly well laid out and interesting fields, especially Valley.
A couple of the refs were real paintballers, willing to give tips and help with equipment issues, very knowledgeable.
Found 10 bucks in the parking lot.
Gas station nearby was about 20 cents cheaper than anywhere else in DC area.

Most of the refs were clueless. One whined constantly that he wanted to be playing instead of reffing, and actually talked on his cell phone during the rounds.
Long wait between rounds, at least 10 minutes, usually more like 15-20.
Unbalanced Teams.
Crappy paint that chops almost every time; would never put it in my own marker.
Crappy Markers, even as rentals go. Actually had the pin fall out of one. Numerous people had to sit out afternoon rounds because they ran out of rentals after so many failed. I understand that it was chilly outside, but come on.
Should have a 4WD vehicle to deal with parking lot (one guy in a SAAB blew out a tire).
Long safety brief that is condescending and insulting to my intelligence.
No pro shop, not much technical expertise.
Crappy manager that tried to steal my paint.

Review Comments
bigassdork4life Saturday, December 17th, 2005 | 9:59 am PST
your cons are totally incorrect. well the first one was.

first off it was my day off i wasnt supposed to be working
two, i wasnt on my cell phone talking, i was calling down to the bottom cabin for them to bring up more supplies!

so go suck a rake.

o3aznkid Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 | 4:49 am PST
ok, for the dispute goes, this is a tottaly CRAP review. If u havnt, noticed, most of the time they're on radio or cell phones are to get supplies like WATER up to the fields by ATV, if im correct if ppl want to buy them. But one of ur cons are correct, wen i did go, we spent more time in the dead zone then needed, because some refs, just chatted instead of asking ppl if they are ready or not, thus that, we didnt get as much rounds in as we could.

As far as rentals go, they do NOT have a proshop, so are u Expecting ANGELS, cuz i hope ur not, rentals are not ment to be the BEST guns out there, just a few choices for a player who doesnt have their own gear to come and play. Of course the guns are gonna be inaccurate there rentals, and u cant expect more. Last time i checked, they now have Smart Parts Ions for people to rent. I have an Ion myself and i think its one of the best markers in its price range, and its deffinetly a BETTER choice to rent instead of a tippmann so stop complaining.

so are the staff
Last edited on Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 at 5:11 am PST

o3aznkid Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 | 5:06 am PST
hey bigassdork, can i get a contact from u like, AIM or msn messenger or something, jsut wanna keep a contact, i might go there again sometime this month.
Last edited on Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 at 5:08 am PST

protomatrix08 Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 | 5:40 am PST
dude so you had a bad time at hogback, it was cold that day nothing was working right we were doing everything to try and help you with your gun. i was the ref that took over after lunch everyone was happy after lunch except for you i personally looked at your gun 3 times and every time i looked at it i got it working. i think it was the user not the gun because when you went down the hill they told me that it was working fine. i just cant understand why you were being such a poor sport and a little baby. im sorry you had a bad time but i was trying to help you all day after lunch when i took over reffing. i hope you come back and try our field again, but if you dont im sorry for your inconvenience

o3aznkid Wednesday, December 21st, 2005 | 5:52 am PST
hey can i get 1 of ur refs, contacts like an email, aim or something. Just to chat a lil.

bigassdork4life Thursday, December 22nd, 2005 | 11:49 am PST
yeah, my email is my names calvin. yo gary whats your sn, i want to talk to you

protomatrix08 Friday, December 23rd, 2005 | 6:36 am PST
hey Calvin it icaruscanopies24 and my email is

dyepunk13 Saturday, May 27th, 2006 | 9:51 pm PST
haha..."After half-an hour of being talked to like an autistic 3 year old during the briefing." so true man, so true...i went there and it took's a safety briefing in a few lines...keep barrel cover on or u leave, keep mask on when ur on the field or when the refs tell u to keep it on, don't bonus ball, don't shoot wildlife, have fun...the guy's briefing is the exact same everytime...a kid in my history class was a ref (got fired lol) could recite the mans briefing...he dosn't say anything's like he's reading a piece of paper. my props to ya for gettin ur $30 and the paint...good goin lol :D and protomatrix man, i g2 agree with you...i can't stand hogback for various reasons, but a lot of kids do just complain there gun isn't workin, when it's fine, and then they piss and moan on here about it. i'm a ref at pevs and i get crap like that all the time. if a kid is complaining, just try to keep gettin him/her a new gun...thats y u should have a proshop, or sumplace where u can get ur gun fixed.
Last edited on Saturday, May 27th, 2006 at 9:53 pm PST

weltsnbrusis Thursday, July 5th, 2007 | 6:19 pm PST

inkslinger333 Thursday, September 27th, 2007 | 11:11 pm PST
LOL For real you guys need to go to warplay and see how a paintball field is supposed to be run, ive been to pevs and hogback and both places stink. Well what do you expect form a bunch of kids running a paintball field, warplay has a couple of teen refs and they are respectfull and are full of knowlege and DO THEIR JOB. I don't pay my hard earned money to have some kid with a rockstar complex not calling hit's or allowing wiping or being to cool to answer questions without attitude ......HOGBACK.. it;s a farm get a wagon to cart people up that freakin hill! come on you are worn out when you get to the top, your hiking up the side of a mountian forGod sake( and i've seen kids winded 1/2 way up) saftey is cool but you have barrell covers on do you need goggles on going up a and if your going to charge 50-60 bucks for paint at least make it draxus, dented diablo paint is unacceptible! PEVS.... get control of all the puck kids running around there going tru your gear bag(and i caught one going thru my friends bag so dont deny it and his bag was unique so there was no mistaking it for others.) and trying to sell me their extremey used ego's( I have a mini, proto rail, a pro ion and a bt-4 assault i don't need your crap). get a remote fill station near the hyperball field and rock garden( or at least a refill truck WITh WATER that can go to the field) i waste so much time walking back and forth to get air and i have 2 tanks!next switch it up rock garden is fun but not after the 4th time in a row. I have been playing since 95' and you guys need to take things seriously if you work for these paintball parks because they are a business and you want return customers and a good rep for your park. So hey guys take some pride in the fact that you are a ref and a rep of the great sport of paintball and do your job (however on a side note to be fair the one older tattooed ref with the white vforce mask with the spikes at pev's was a great help so take pointers from him). shoot ya later kiddies

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