Funniest thing that you have encountered while paintballing

[xtremepantbaler]

I just did this for a topic starter.. The funniest thing that i had encountered while paintballing was during the last round of the day, about two minutes into the game everybody on the otherside started running out not shooting but screaming.. It turns out that there was three rattle snakes that had come out when a couple of our paintballs rolled into there. No one had gotten bitten but it was preety funny:laugh: :crazy:

[GranDream]

Once we were paintballing in the woods and this guy who came to go fishing in a stream pulls up and is like "WTF" so we give him a gun and mask and he starts playing. It was funny, but you had to be there and know who the kid was.

[splatmania]

me and some friends where playing woods ball in the middle of no where and we all had cells except for one kid and guess who got lost ... the one without a cell phone it turns out he walked for like 3 or 4 miles in the completely wrong direction after we got thru playing i say hey where's jesse ...... we spent 4 hours looking 4 him until we found him crying and shooting his paintball gun in the air while screaming lol i have never laghed so hard and he was like 15 years old , city boys go figure

[Deadbydawn]

I Got completely pwned by a noob. ( I know, i'm retarted) He suprised me and bunkered me. He lets loose AT LEAST 20 rounds into me and THEN CHUCKS A GRENADE AT ME! Be both got eliminated. 10 or eleven of the rounds hit me in the chest, completely knocking the wind out of me, so i stood, put my hands up, and tried to gain my breath. then he nails me with the remaining rounds. three of them hit me in the.....jewels. I was laying there quivering on the ground for at lease a couple of minutes. Then i went to get a sandwich.:laugh:

[Aguy43]

I was being a total Arse whole and I told my nooby frien to move up to a specific bunker (In oblivious dangerous territory.) He moved up and I sat there giggiling and he got LIT UP, Worst ive ever seen someone get shot, He ran his *** of yelling "OWW,OWW!"

I laughed for like 5 minutes then proceeded to win the round :)

[RumblingRossage]

Once there was this noob and his hopper was like barely on and there are stairs on our field and there is a bunker on either side of the stairs. This noob runs between those bunkers and I shoot at him and it nails his hopper in the front. The hopper flies off and nails him in the face and head and spills his paint all over. The hit in the head both surprised him and probably hurt. He fell as soon as it hit his head and slid down the stairs! His hopper and rental gun tubling after him. I felt real bad and called out right then to help the poor soul. I run up there with my marker up and get lit up by his nooby friend on the way. lol. Luckily the kid was okay but we were all scared cause it happened so fast. Twenty minutes later we couldnt stop laughing. the noob thought it was funny too!:laugh:

[nahthan]

Well, I was playing a game, chucked a tube to a kid who had run out of paint, missed the first time, got it to him with the second, then I ran out. We were the last two people on our team, and of the other team, only one person had paint.

So the guy with paint shoots the other kid and I make a dash for the snake as someone tried to rush me at our home bunker.

Then, we were playing a 3 on 2 and this one kid told the other kid on my team to watch the left. So, we were playing, and the first kid moves up one on the side. This kid from the other team then rushes down the left tape and shoots the first kid in the side. The first kid starts to go to the side, then turns and rushes the other kid on my team while shooting towards him. So, the other kid on my team shot him.

One player from the other team rushed up the left tape rushed up to do a run through, but I hit him in the hand.

So it pretty much came down to one on one with everyone on the side laughing.

30 seconds later, the kid on the other team says time out so he can see what's going on. So I tell him we'll both put our bbds on at the same time. Game over.

[splatmania]

just got a new one this week this is my all time fav. i got about 10 of us playing woods ball and all of a sudden a guy wearing nothing but a mask and a pink thong go's running thur the middle of our game and the game completely stoped for like 5 min. in an odd silence... turns out it was a freind who sayed he couldent come lol:laugh:

[slaminator3323]

Saw a kid with a yellow ION a yellow empire jersey and pants tried ordering everyone around turns out he had no idea what he was doing, he shot at the spot someone's head had been at a minute ago, ended up calling him bee boy behind his back. He even wiped and told others to wipe too.

[splatmania]

awww i hate that tell me where he lives so i can call him beeboy to his face and throw rocks at him :laugh:

[Deadbydawn]

throw flaming spears that were shoved up a demons arse, then RAM THEM DOWN HIS FRIGGIN NECK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!pant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!pant (Passes out)

[happy_baller]

Well we where playing in my friends back yard for his b-day. There was newb last person on the opposing team comes out of nowhere firing a samuri from his hip screaming Die u SOBs he then trips over a root then gets lit up.

[ir0nExpress]

Originally posted by splatmania
me and some friends where playing woods ball in the middle of no where and we all had cells except for one kid and guess who got lost ... the one without a cell phone it turns out he walked for like 3 or 4 miles in the completely wrong direction after we got thru playing i say hey where's jesse ...... we spent 4 hours looking 4 him until we found him crying and shooting his paintball gun in the air while screaming lol i have never laghed so hard and he was like 15 years old , city boys go figure

Cant be a city boy, ALL city boys have cell phones.

[xtremepantbaler]

Originally posted by ir0nExpress


Cant be a city boy, ALL city boys have cell phones.

unless the city boys cellphone was only for the city, he wouldn't ever thought of comin out and paintballin in the woods... i donno just a thought

[Mentalmonkey10]

first time at this new field, there was 1 kid who looked and acted 7 or 8, and was SCARED TO DEATH of being shot. My friend went to the bunker that he was at and the kid starts frantically saying, "they are going to get me arent they? i dont want to get shot! Help me help me!!!." To make him quiet my friend told him that he was going to protect him. I was throwing him a pod, so he was turned around, and when he cought it, his gun went off. He nailed him in the back from about 4 in. with brass egeal paint, then the kick shot his gun again. All i hear is screams of FEAR, not pain, FEAR. He raises, and slowly walks out with his gun half-up, and gets LIT UP. We couldn't stop laughing.

[Mentalmonkey10]

about that little kid, on the last game of the day, he was still there. But by that time, all the good kids(angels, autocockers, e-spyders, bob longs) have tooken off their arm bands, and all the kids with rentels (the kid) have kept their arm bands on, so it is sort of 1 sided. oh ya, it was about 25 people(good) to 15 people(bad), because of the arm bands. The kid was way in the back, and was the only one left, with about 15 on my side. EVERYONE rushes in on him, and were fiering as fast as possible. after about 6 people were about within 7 feet, the ref calls game over. We keep playing. the kid was on the ground geting shot like crazy. I could hear his screams from the 20 feet that i was at.:laugh: all i saw was his mask and body covered in paint. After the match i saw im come limping back to the tabels holding his happy place and his neck. it was mean laughing, but i did it anyway. :laugh:

[Phathed]

i have a couple, one time i was playing in NJ, and this kid is standing there with his bak to me, turns out he was takeing a leak. On the same day, i just filled my hopper, and i didnt close the lid, and the kid that was in the bunker with me says, hold my gun a sec. so i lift my gun up and i here all my paintballs come out. and i was just playing paintball a couple days ago, and i was with this one kid and i was on a rock and jumped down, it was only like a 1 foot drop, and before i could say be careful, he comes down and lands on another rock and sprains hi ankle, it was sooo swollen, but he still played, he was a "stationary gunner" he got one out. but it was soo funny, he was this close to breaking it.

[Cody S 117]

Ok,
Some friends and I were playing woodsball about four months ago. Both teams were positioned towards eachother in a huge frontline battle.
This Asian guy (nothing against them) walked through the middle of the battle, balls shooting from one side to the other right past him. He is walknig with his gun resting on his shoulder and is WHISTLING as he walks on.
Eventually our team nailed him and he went down. We coudln't stop laughnig at the end of the game.:D

[Dunty]

Alright, this isn't a personal story, but my brother is on a team called Team Ballistic, and, anyways, in their first tournament of the season, they had it down to one of their guys(3 man) he had my Imagine(His Imagine was broken) and the other guy was a guy terrified of being shotm just kinda sat behind his own bunker, and Stan was walking up the field whistling a happy tune, and just walked by and shot him.

[punk_rocker543]

Ran to the fifty screaming "Tator-tots" at the top of my lungs. It was so funny, it was my code name for the back brick, lol.

[balls o steel]

welll got a couple of stories both were while I was reffing.

OK so its like the middle of winter Im all bunddled up and there is a creek that rund down the far side of this field so i am watching this guy and he ask me so how deep is this water i was like oh not very not to mention there is ice on it youll be fine so he starts to cross and about in the middle you hear a crack and then boom he falls in and this water is like waist deep and ther is ice its a halarious deal now everybody hears this and just unloads on the guy I want to help him but its cold and I am laughing so hard I cant even stand.

Next SO we are out last week and this older guy shows up all tricked out with the scenario garb and is allablut kicking some --- on the speed ball course well didnt quite happen that way he ended up falling on his --- running away from 2 10yr olds that stuff just makes your day when its like 100+ outside.

Well hope you laughed half as much as i did.

[pb4fun]

First of all I <3 playing noobs its always funny.

Allright I was playing woodsball and on this field there were alot of bunkers and spools. Allright off the break my marker runs out of air, and later I realized I was out of paint. I fifty off the break. Then I make a balls in hand dash up the side of the field to where this little noob is hiding. I tell him to go out and he does ( remeber all I had was a marker, no air or paint). Then like a ninja lol..... I snuck up behind my friend and put my marker on his back. Then he went out. ALlright there is this bunker where there are like 7 noobs are just hiding. I run up and dive I tagged the bunker. That was the end of the round. I got 9 people out with no air or paint. After I tagged the bunker the ref called the match over.. the noobs came out from behind it and began to shoot at me. I guess they hadnt heard the call. I got shot in the back like 10 times before the ref ended it. I think he was laughing at me........:laugh: :laugh:

[Shimboodo]

I saw a short clip of a guy hopping along a speedball field with his pants around his ankles. Funny stuff.

[Phathed]

i screamed "ADREAIN!!!"during a game. i got a couple laughs.

[drumjester]

A few weeks back it was me and 3 other friends vs 5 noobs in a wicked city field. So i take one of my friends and move up the right while my other friend and bro move up the left. After a few min i hear one kid just shout "Please dont shoot, please, please, i give up. Leave me alone" And then a kid bolts off the field. Now it ended up that my friend moved up to a building, went under a window and just shoved his barrel up through the window and the kid got sooo freaked out. Best part was that we took all 5 with no casultys. It was great.

[Krunchypants]

I went with a group of my friends to go play adn one of the guys had never played before. All my friends call him that Rich guy because his name was Rich. One of my friends played pump that round he see rich sticking out a little to far. so he snapshoots and nails him in the neck. The ball didn't bus, but my friend sya he dropped his gun and grabbed his neck screaming "OH DEAR GOD!" Then my friend flanked him and and he siad he heard him screaming. "Where the heck is he? it's a freaking ghost!" When we played speedball he ran for the snake (he is a big short guy) and my other friend lights him up with like six balls in the ribs. Then another round I flank him and shoot him in the shoulder blade about 4 times. On top of it all he got shot on his left nipple 3 joking times. We recently stopped calling him That Rich Guy and started calling him "Bruise"

[splatmania]

are u like 5 years old or are just a retard ?:rolleyes:

[PB-Predater]

My friend, my cousin, and I were running to the Alamo on the rec field when all the sudden I hear 2 "THUD". My friend had tripped over a root and my and cousin fell into a ditch it was the funniest thing ive ever seen. :laugh:

[Krunchypants]

I have just got a weird sense of humor.:crazy:

[SuperTrooper_OT]

Back in the days when we had our OLD speedball field(mostly just wooden bunkers), during one game i saw a guy in a gilliesuit lying on the ground and scanning the course. i was maybe 15 feet in front of him so i had no choice but to light him up:D

[Ashskates]

I was playing attack and defend and this little tiny noob( he looked 7 but was going into 8th grade) was having problems with his hopper. It had fallen off for about the third time that day. He was SITTING, behind a rock with his legs split in front of him trying to pick up his paint. So he got shot right between the legs, he froze up and fell over stiff as a board and laid there for about 10 min.:laugh:

On my first day on the last game i was in a firefight with this guy and was pausing to rest behind my bunker. He rushing me and told me to surrender and I didn't know he was there because I was look9ing the other way. He scared the ---- out of me and I spun around and took fired aff a relfex shot to his sensitive area from two feet, I pretend to be really sorry so he didn't punch me or something.

[pb4fun]

I shot myself in the foot in front of a ref once. Stupid trigger on my Promaster is too light. I barely flicked it and bam. Hehehe at teh field that I play at they have portapotties and my friend and I were really bored because no one wanted to play. There were two portapotties down hill from the staging area. They are set up so that you can only see one from the staging area. Allright so my friend and I unloaded in the far one with our markers (lol not like that sicko.....) so that someone would have to go into the first one. Allright so my friend and I waited for a half an hour to go. So this guy goes into the far one comes out after seeing our mess, then goes into the close one. There a little vent strips at the top that are bolted down but have larger holes. My friend and I dumped two halo fulls of paint into that vent. The guy finally came out once we had finished shooting head to toe in blue paint ( we were shooting blue paint) Then the manager who did not see what we had done, asked the guy who came out of teh bathroom if he had had an accident. My firend and I laughed so hard.

[ASAP]

One funny moment on the field was during an elimination game. Not long into it, one of the guys on my team jumped out of his bunker and started singing "Row Row Your Boat". And then he started dancing. Really, really, badly. Needless to say, he didn't last long. I still don't know what that guy was on.

Another funny moment I saw was durning a funraiser for the American Cancer Society. Some guy dressed up in a chicken outfit and ran onto the field with a megaphone in his hand. And started shouting some random stuff, "Run faster, damn you!" and "$20 off all furnature."

Good times. Good times.

[Tom_D]

I was playing at an old speedball field with a bunch of people from my wife's work. Wood bunkers large field. None of them were realy into paintball they were just there to shoot the people they work with. Needless to say I was realy racking up the eliminations.

Well this one guy must have gotten fed up with me shooting him out. Sooo he does this retarded Rambo charge right at me screaming at the top of his lungs. (he wasnt putting paint anywhere near me beacuse he was at a full sprint)

here is where it gets good

I just knelt down and UNLOADED on him. This would have been funny in itself, but about 4 of my shots hit him in the visor so he could no longer see. And he was sill running at a full sprint!!!!!!!!!! Needless to say he then triped and as he was tumbleing to the ground he ended up face-planting the wooden bunker!!!!!!!!

I nearly pissed my pants I was laughing so hard. (actualy I think I did a little)

[kjpmkjp]

Funniest i've seen was some dude hiding in a Bunnyhunt game. He had this great hiding spot, noone found him at all...and then all of a sudden we hear this loud ringing sound of a cell phone ringtone, followed by one loud swear word. Simply put, we all found him and lit him up.

[pb4fun]

which is why you put your phone on vibrate.....:rolleyes: I think the time My friend and I were playing one on one is the best of mine. We started on opposite sides of a large field. He went to this side bunker. I shot at him to get hium to go down. Then I ran to his side of the field and got behind the bunker like 10 ft in front of him. I stood there staring at him and when he popped out he saw me and screamed...lol..

[splatmania]

got a new one me and a few buddy's where playing in a feild (2vs2) and me any my freind hid in some tall grass waiting for a victem when 1 of the other guys just come walking along like he has no care in the world and i yell FIRE !!! and we cover him in paint from 10ft away and he gets mad and throws his mask off and starts cussing lol

[Dead Aim77]

One time i was shooting at a piece of wood and the ref was rigth behind it. i fire 5 shot 4 hit the wood the other one kinda hit the ref in the leg. He tried to pretend nothing happened as he limped away cursing under his breath.

[(Sum41)]

If you have seen the episode of southpark when they play charlies angles then you will know whats goin on in my story. Me and two other friends played a 3 on 7 game. We decided to runn up the hill to the entrance to the field screaming charlies angles battle formation. We all had tigershark pumps from the old days and one hopper. We did ok but got wrecked. i got someone though some how. I guess it seems kind of stupid but it was pretty funny to us. Oh yeah i ran into a bunker and flipped that game too.

[slink1]

i was play on this field with a castle in the middle, it has those things were there is a high section then a low then a high and so on. so i was snap shooting from behind one of the high sections at a guy who was on the other side of the castle ( about 20 feet) the ref is standing like another 10 or 15 feet back, so i shoot miss the guy on the other side of the castle and hit the ref square in the chest, you would think he would move but he didnt, so i just contenued to shoot at the guy, i hit him once, it bounces, then the next few hit the ref in that balls, he just crumpled up on the ground and the other refs thew painballs at him. i laughed

[splatmania]

i was playing with a freind (his first time) and the ref's where in the middle of the field on top of a hill and my freind is blind firing and i start yelling at him about it and then all of a sudden i hear a ouch !! what the hell !! and my freind yells i got one !! it turns out it was the ref. and he had to sit out the next game 4 it lol

[punk_rocker543]

On one of my good freinds first times playing he shot the ref because he wanted to know that he at least hit someone.

[pb4fun]

I saw this guy face plant in a creek once. Funny because he got lit up too.

[Daliz]

A few weeks ago while we were woodsballin, I got shot on the loader so that the lid opened (I didn't notice that), and when I raised my gun and called myself out, all the paint dropped on my head :D

[PB-Predater]

It was 6 on 6 on the speed ball field and I was the last one left and there was only 1 guy left on the other team too, I didn't know it yet untill the spectators yelled 1 on 1 and all the sudden a guy comes out from the 50 and trys to bunker me. I ran out of my bunker and forced him into one and we kept running circles then I went to pull a pod out and the spectators are like hes getting a pod!! So I slam my lid shut and stand up and the guy is running at me again so I run and we both shoot eachother but no breaks then he ran out of paint.

[Mentalmonkey10]

today, i saw about 6 people in a 5ft by 5ft tunnel. when someone trys to bunker them, they "dissapeared." so i look at him, he was across from the entrence of the tunnel. he says "they must of came out the other side." and he walks out. I hear like 12 rnds, and see him gripping his @** screaming. turns out, they didn't just leave. :P

oh, ya. today me and a bunch of my friends, and some kids who i don't know did something completely discracefull. so we were playing airball and played about 4 rounds, then a team(stock class, and sponsored by empire) shows up to drill for an upcomeing tourny. they watch one game, then they decide to chalenge us in a 7 on 5 game. one of my friends who thought that pumps are worthless thinks that we can win(we had a heavly uped e spyder, a heavly uped 98c,a stock 98c, and a shocker allong wiht some other good guns includeing more tippmans.) soo, right off the break, 4 people get out, includeing me, i had all 5 different colers of paint on me. I don't even bother to watch, i walk back. after my friends walk back to me, i asked them how long was the game and if we got anyone. we didn't get anyone out, and the game lasted 15 seconds. even though i got shot a lot, i still thought it was funney...seing my friend eat his own words.:P

later, i saw a 10 year old with a rental bunker a 30 year old guy. twice in two games.:eek:

[pb4fun]

today might have taken the cake.

1. 15 on 15 airball. (50 yard field) Bunch of college guys using markers shooting hot and the game was just about using all of your leftover paint.

2. Guy shoots one paintball randomly. It flies across the field to the other teams starting bunker. Curves perfectly and hits the guys nipple right on the money.

3. Guy shot the bunker in front of him ( His bunker) and screamed and that was a college guy

4. It was 6 on 12 and everone had rentals except for one guy on the 6 team He was using an angel. Everyone just starts shooting off the break. The good guy runs up the side and makes it to the car wash. This one guy runs to hide behind this little bunker but overshoots or ran past it. He gets shot like 5 times by the good guy. The he overuns the bunker on the other side. He gets nailed in the side of the face by a marker shooting hot. He litterally flips around in mid air and lands on his side . His teamates are just laughing at him.

5. There were 4 refs in a 15 on 15 woodsball game. The last guy left on the other team. gets called for a paint check. My friend who was also reffing goes down for a paint check. Then the player that shot him goes ( Let me see) as soon as the dude who was being checked by the ref sees the other guy he starts shooting. My friend gets stuck in the crossfire and runs for a bunker. The paint checked dude is running right behind him. THey make it to a bunker ( remember my friend is a ref) and they come out the other side and the guy is still following my friend the ref. My friend got run over by the guy and then he just layed there. LMAO it was the funniest day ever...ROFL

[Shippi]

I was playing with friends at a farm we used to rent for paintball. We were playing 'bunny hunt', where one player is a 'bunny', with as much paint as they want, and the rest are all hunters, with 10 - 20 paintballs each. The bunny goes off and hides, and radios back when done. Then, the rest go hunting.

This one time, we searched the entire site without finding a thing. We were really bored, it was too hot, we were searching along the edge of the field. There was loads of old farm equipment there, all rusted and broken. There was this big, cylindrical tank type thing, with a head sized hole in. Me and my friend were leading the group, and I said to him 'Heh, I bet he's in there.. wanna go check?' jokingly. He replies, 'Nah... he probably is in there, too, haha.' So we pass, and the group of 4 or so of my other friends walk past. Suddenly, we hear the people behind us shout, and we're shot in the back. A hand, holding a paint pistol, is sticking out that hole and he shot us! The rest of our group run away in a panic, and he climbs out the thing and runs off in the other direction. I can't remember who won.. I was too busy laughing to care :)

I miss that place :(

[di$TOrTed]

i saw a guy playing, and his cell phone rang in his pocket and he ran to a bunkered and answered it

[krn13oi]

we were playing woods and it wuz a 1 on 1 at the end... me and my friend were going at it and so we just ran at each other and ran in circles about 10 feet away from one another just unloading our guns after about 5 seconds of that we stopped and asked if the other person wuz out... we missed all those shots... in conclusion he ended up hitting my right nipple lol

[nate180_2005]

at this years gobal conquest at the very end of the day everyone deciedes to turn on canada (my team) for no good reason. well one of my good friends was in the village and if you went to this years gobal conquest you'll know that canada had like 60 people while everyone else had at least 100. well anyways he was alone in the village and everyone started yelling "shoot the canadians they betrayed us" and my friend looks at the lil kid sharing the same bunker as he is and says "im not going to shoot you" and he looks at my friend and says "ok" then my friend just takes off running for the woods... well he didnt make it every single person in the village turned around and lit him up... he came back all pissed off covered in paint... it was hilarious

[ase]

Originally posted by di$TOrTed
i saw a guy playing, and his cell phone rang in his pocket and he ran to a bunkered and answered it

yep, ive answered my phone during a game.

[Mentalmonkey10]

me, right when the game ended. I mean like 5 seconds after. I pulled out my phone and called to get picked up. One of the kids near me was like, "whats he doing:eyes:?"

[splatmania]

i awnser my phone all the time when im playing its not a big deal unless your in the middle of a fire fight

[spydadude]

:finger: No cell phones on the field I play at.

I saw a group of about seven 10-year-olds playing at a field. We play in the dark, and 4 of them were wearing woodland camo. Finally, the other kids freak out when they get shot at and shoot one of their own. It just kept repeating until one was left, and he got killed by some guy with a Piranha.

[splatmania]

lol a freind was hiding from us in a woods ball game he had to be on a team full of noobs while all of use (who knew how to play) were on the same team we kill them all cept for my freind after about 10 min i got the bright idea to call his cell # and we all hear hello moto coming from a near by bush which was quickly fallowed by a "o ****" . he got lit up by everyone :laugh:
we call him moto now

[digitol]

This one time, an asian guy found a porn magazine in the bushes. His gun crapped out on him so he put it away and just went on the field with the magazine. he ran throughout the entire game sticking pages to the walls. good times

[Mentalmonkey10]

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: someone should sig that :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: good times...

[aimedplanet]

Once while watching an OPPL event I watched one of the novice team players who was playing snake was hiding out walking his trigger but not shooting and accidentally pulled the trigger. Popped a ball onto the bunker and he almost shat himself! Funniest thing I ever did was curve a ball around a bunker (not on purpose mind you. dirty barrel) and nail a guy in the johnson. Thats the best I can do.

[Mentalmonkey10]

ok, first off, i didn't see this, the reff next to me (i was out) saw it. well...
I was at a prety big field, and there was a massive amount of newbs there for some reason. well, i got out and was standing next to a ref and a few other people not paying atention.:P well, i suddenly hear a 2 refs laughing their ***'s off. one ref was on the field, and the other next to me. Well, someone ran up to the ref on the field and stole his towl for cover until he got to the bunker, then he threw it back at the ref and continued to play.

the one other time was when i was at a field that was a sort of... "maze." well, around the corner i hear from someone on the other team "he's f*****g comeing," so i get ready to "fend off" being bunkered, then i hear from a ref "stop f*****g cussing." When i herd the kid say "sorry" i preceded to bunker the foo.:P

[joebobjoe]

At my field, if you take your mask off when your still on the field you get a chioce of 25 push-ups (military style) or firing squad (from 15 feet away). So then these newbs diobey the rules and the ref gives them the chioce (they were scared to death...lol) and suddenly this random kid volunteers to do push-ups for them. But by that time the ref decides there isn't enough time to do push-ups so he orders firing squad. Lets just say I felt sorry for that kid, afterall he didn't do anything, he was volunteering for push-ups. Two people with Angels set them to auto and I get one round on his nipple (I could only get one shot because as soon as the ref ordered firing squad the 10 year old kid was half way across the field. (yes he did start crying, I felt sorry and bought him a drink afterwards)

P.S. He had VERY large bruises...

[parlee]

LOL I have a few I got a dollar for jumping up and running down the hole feild and bunkering someone, so I ran the hole thing and was yelling as loud as i chould and I ran up to the bunker went to shoot over it and get the person out and my gub jamed :mad: and my arm got lit up prity good. Then I talked to the person that was is the bunker and she almost cryed cuz she was scard so bad lol.

A nother one was we were a big game in Turo and some guy was useing a morter and he was shooting EGG'S out of the thing at people and in the same game some guy got hit in the face with a gernade.

[MFCT]

Not really encountered, but actually did myself. So, I was with a group of 4, flanking the opposition. We were making our way next to a river, through 6ft trees, shrubs, etc. It was a very tight trail and we were only 30 yrds from the enemy HQ, so it was slow going and very stressful. I was behind the point man, watching towards the enemy location to ensure we were not being spotted. Suddenly, I drop about 4 feet and from the sudden hit at the bottom, my hopper flies open, dumping all but 11 or so balls all around me. I fell into an embankment hole. I kept my wits about me while I dropped and ensured I didn't say anything, but we had to struggle not to giggle too loud. I managed to work my way out of the hole without making too much noise and we went on to win the round.

I just remember dropping, hitting the bottom and then looking up at my teammates going "WTF!". No one saw that hole and the point man simply stepped around it. He didn't even notice it.


Here's one more: Our group initates all newbies with a single round from 30ft. Just to get them over the inital "fear" of being shot. One outing, our newest guy is told the details of the newbie shot and gets his gear on to accept his fate. However, instead of walking slowly out to the location, he starts running around, yelling for us to shoot him. It was like a pack of dogs...everyone (about 7 people) raised their weapons and lit the guy up. After the screaming and laughing, he explained he thought he was supposed to do that. So much for following directions.

[tippmannmandan]

This is the best one I'v got. Me and my friend Jake were building a paintball assault tank to use at his field and let me tell you it was awesome. After makeing hindge wooden doors and steel flashing for armour and acrlic plastic for a windshield it was almost finished.The only area not covered was the area by your legs, but we didn't think you would get shot there much so we invited everybody out to try it out. There was 24 people there and after a few games we decided to break out the beast but me and Jake didn't want to be the ones testing it so my other friends Rob and Matt did. Matt was the passenger and had a borrowed Tippmann Special .68 and Rob was unarmed and driving. The game was supposed to be a 11v11v2 and at the break I run out to the center with "The Shield of Squeer" (another invention by me and Jake, basical a spring loaded shield that when you press a button spirals out ward to form a shield that is about 12" in diameter) with my Tippy 98 and get shot at but block most with the shield then fall back. All of a sudden the tank comes hauling *** . My friend Tony was on the back with his Icon LCD mowing down people left and right with Matt sniping out the side and Rob driving like the guy off The Fast and the Furious. Rob rams into one of our teams main bunkers (thats right he rammed it, as in hit the wooden bunker going about 35 mph). At this time I yell at a kid on my team named Caleb to shoot the windshield and blind the tank. Rob hearing me quickly pops a cookie and throws Tony off the tank (Tony was fine just incase you were worried). However Rob wasn't as lucky Caleb fires one shot. And with the holy aim of Legolas it flies through the leg opening and nails Rob in the tesicles. Quickly fireing about 4 shots at the windshield blinding the tank. I then got lit up by Tony. The tank however wasn't as lucky, Rob now blind and in extreme pain rams Jakes 12' trampoline with the tank sending Matt's head through the windshield. Rob slams into the stearingwheel screaming and throws open the door to the tank and falls to the ground. Everybody was scared as hell and thought he had died, but he slowly got up and walked off the coarse and iced down his balls. Me and Jake are currently fixing and rearmoring the tank.
This is the best story I think that has ever happened to me playing paintball and we still give Rob alot of **** about his "driving".

Another story is about a third invention by me and Jake. We build a hugh paintball cannon. And we'd poor about 150 paintballs down the barrel. Compress the tank. Have to guys stand about 10 yards away and let 'er rip. Covering the poor guys head to foot in paint.

[parlee]

lol
sounds pirty awsome

[tippmannmandan]

I know it was hillarius

[parlee]

got pics ? of it

[tippmannmandan]

unfortunatly no we didn't have a camera and If we did we were to afraid to take any because we were all scared as hell.

[aimedplanet]

The last time I played at my field, I ended up playing with the Toronto Mavericks (If anyone knows who they are, they'll understand what I was up against). Anyway, after a serious 5 on 5 it was down to 1 on 1, me and 1 guy in the snake. After 3 minutes of snapping at eachother I finally bunkered him and it was over.
In another game, started at 5 on 5 finished with 2 on 1 (I was on the 2) and my gun starts burping while I'm starting a run through on the last guy. I ended up ducking behind the dorito and checking my gun. 100 psi. I threw another full pod after that with 100 PSI left in the gun. No idea how i did it. I got the elimination so thats what matters.

[MagnumSpyder]

i was playing woods ball at our local field and this guy with an A-5 shoots at me from behind a bush and hits this little middle school kid 5 times, his hopper exploded and he did a faceplant three feet away!

[Govinda_T]

Well, there was this group of 3-4 little kids that looked about 10-12 years old at my local field. It was right at the end of a game, and they were like, "OMG! That tournament guy was soooo AWESOME!!! He has like the best gun! Did you see how awesome he was? :love: " Then, I overheard them talking before the game, and one said "I always get shot out real early in the game." The other one, decked out in tourney gear, says, "Oh, well when that happens, I just wipe the paint off and keep playing. I suggest you do the same." :pissed: Then this kid with an Angel walks on the field, and they are like "WOW! He has an ANGEL!!! We are gonna pick him first!" They picked me to be on their team the first game (because they thought my A-5 was way cool, lol, and they were picking everyone based on their equipment), so I just abandoned them off the break (it was speedball style attack and defend the fort). Needless to say, they sucked something wicked, and they were gone very early on. The second game, they were all on the attacking team, and I was on the defending team (hehehe...), and the kid with the Angel was on my team. I heard him yelling "Your OUT! There is a hit on your hopper!" Now the kid knew he was obviously out, but he kept on playing, even wiping multiple hits! So the Angel kid and I decided to tag-team him, and we lit the crap out of him and he FINALLY called himself out, with a little help from the ref. I think it goes without saying he didn't wipe much for the rest of the day. :laugh:

[bridic]

Fort Campbell, KY Army training village.

5 guys decided to pick up a 36" door and try to walk through the clearing using it as protection. There were 2 holes where knobs once were. Myself and another member of my team starting ripping at the door. The door stopped moving and ll 5 guys lined up in a straight line so that none of them would get shot. They used the hole to carry the door but every time they stuck their finger in the hole they got shot. It got down to only one guy back there and he couldn't carry the door and shoot so he decided to kneel down lean the door against his head and shoot through the holes. Remember is in the middle of the clearing with no protection. That being said, a nice wind came through and you see the door start falling forward.
There he was, kneeling down, alone, with a OMG look on his face. He got lit up like a Christmas tree. It was hard to shot him because we were laughing so hard tears were running down my face.

[K.o.N.]

We did something like thatwhen we we're playing in this abandoned house we used to go to to play some paintball. It was a capture the flag like game, there was this arnold schwarzenneger like plastic doll serving as the flag in the middle of a Futsal field (5Vs.5indoor soccer, but this one was outdoor :D), it was absolutely surroundedby vegetation, and using it for the game was legal, me and my friend we're trying to flank the guys at the other end of the field and stumble across an abondoned wooden door. We thought it would be funny to use, and we we're like 17 and working on a budget (the whole group was :D) so we thougt no one would use their extremely expensive (not really, but as I said..we we're on a budget..a really tight one :D) ammo trying to shoot my fingers as I holded the door in place by the side, and he would shoot anyone tryng to flank..well..apparently 5 out of a 7 men team decided that putting some bruises on my fingers was a worthy cause...when the fell down my friend was in the middle of an absolutely unprotected ares, hands already up calling himself out as loud as he could:D.
Everyone had a good laugh and our "instructor" (i'm referring to the guy that rents the equipment, provides the field, explains the game and reffs) thought it was a great idea, a told us to next time use the wrecked car(it had a really amazing outstretch of land around the hous, that people used to use for junk car racing, some never left :D) doors, they had holdings on the inside.
(BTW, I wasn't laughing, I was just trying to look tough :D).

[Mentalmonkey10]

my god that had a lot of happy faces.:dodgy:

a kid i know was pined down 2 v. 10 and both of them were in the same bunker. well, the kid he was with took a paintball and poped it on his chest so ke could get out. when my friend saw this happen, he shot his friend in the *** while he was walking off the field.

[jamaicanpride]

thsi is really annoying
i just switched from jeans to some '05 proto pants and no noobs want to play with me

[drunkenMonkey]

I was on the hyperball field, and i had been reffing, b/c i was letting a guy shoot my gun. Well, i was watching the game, and this kid that had a scope, was using it trying to shoot some guy, at the opposite end of the snake. The kid was in a bunker that was infront of the snake. well, he is on his stomach and crawls to the wide open space between his bunker and the snake and tries to aim through his scope. well the guy at the other end, moves to a standup at the opposite end of the snake, and lights his *** up. it was hilarious. if i had a camera i would have taken a pic and posted it up.

[Fortunazblade0]

My friends and I came back from the 3 man speedball field just as a private group was coming in. The moment we all sit down the game starts and all you could hear was either the rentals being fired or girls screaming. One of them even threw their rental down on the ground. The second time they played my friends were all standing by the field and like a minute into the game we all hear a gun low on CO2 and the girl was just screaming and crying like the gun was about to explode.

That was one of the highlights of the day.

[splatmania]

last sunday me and my freinds where playing 5 man speed ball and 1 guy joins the other side and he had a proto matrix + he was realy good !!!
so he wipes out everyone on my team besides me by himself and i get him and turn around and a little kid came out of no where and bunkers me !!!
he scared the crap out of me lol

[Newclearwaste]

I was playing a woodsball(huge area so games took a while, it was capture the flag, each team had a 2 story fort, and the flag was kept on the second story) and this was like the 11th game of the day so this time I decided to stay back and gaurd the flag instead of running like a maniac up the field shooting people. on our team there was this noob that was soooooo scared of being hit that he always hid in the back near the flag. So he was up there with me and I saw a group of 3 people easing their way twards our base, trying not to be seen. so I told the kid that I'd be right back and for him to stay there. So I leave the fort, end up bunkering the whole group and I came back. When I got to the top of the stairs I turned a certain way so that the noob couldn't see my arm band(thats how we distinguised who was on wut team) and he went crazy and shoot me like 8 times in my back, 50 of the balls missed but he still got me and I was called out.:mad: :laugh: :mad: :laugh: :mad: :laugh:

[TeamInfernoCapt]

OK, I was in a last man standing match with about 30 people at a camp. I was shooting at some young noobs when I hear the whistle blow. People were emerging out of the forest everywere, walking down the hill. When I got to the bottom of the hill I noticed a noob 12-year-old balling his eyes out and one of the camp counselors was talking to him. The kid evidentually got shot up by four of my friends, and he screamed so loud and girlish that everyone thought that it was the whistle. So they sent us back in to keep playing.

[wolfwood3996]

I was at the local field after a match had just ended. There are some guys with a video camera on the field and one gun. One of the guys is wearing a mask and says, "Okay, dont shoot me till im about 20 feet away..." well any way he starts skipping across the field singing and im just cracking up, but when he gets only about 5 feet away, his friend shoots him in the ***. The guy just started half screaming half laughing. It was the most hillarious thing to see on the camera again about 2 minutes later.:D

[Monk@yballa]

My latest funniest was yesterday i was playin in a corn maze. i had to get into the other base to win (this is not me i normally play tourneys). well it was just me so the two refs that were followin me run ahead of me to see if anyone was there. one runs back and says "theres two right there" and points ahead. the ref then runs off and i cant see him. so i unload about half a hopper in like 6 seconds and hear the ref screaming. The balls had all just flew right by his head and he was curled up on the ground.

[iplaynaked]

getting massaged and sammiched in the dead box :dodgy:

[wolfhawk46]

My buddy and I got 3 squids to surrender, they were all in one bunker...that's not the funny part though, the funny part is that me and my buddy were out of PAINT!...I'd say that's pretty fricking hilarious.

[wolfhawk46]

I also shot some poor guy in the crotch back when I had my dragun...was on the ground for like 5 minutes, real nice guy, I felt bad. But that's what you get for playing with a phantom agianst an electro.

[fangson559]

ok it was 6am and i was the onlt 1 there until this kid and his dad showed up then 10 more people came and this kid that came after me had a pump and 5hrs later he hasent played 1 game so i took him 1 on 1 with my pump and told my self hot him on the gun so he doesnt cry. when i did booooom
the damn gun exploded from the co2 must of had to much presure on it i run up to him he was crying then my team gave him a spyder pilot lol it was so funny

[fangson559]

if i used my ego on him he would have died crying

[wolfhawk46]

lol are you teh writer of teh blade review of that same story? cause those reviews are fricking hilarious

[belvins]

one time me and my friends were playin woodsball at one of my friends house and he has this sniper tower built. well, he didn't get around to cutting this branch that was in the way. so no one was going up there except for one of my friends, who said he wanted to try it. there was NO way that u could shoot at some one without hitting that branch. so for almost the whole day he emptied hopperfull after hopperfull on that branch.
talk about waste of paint hhaha.

[IronCorps]

Really hot day in Maine at Rogue Paintball.
Bunch of noobs standing around with thier rentals waiting for the next game.

One of thier co2 tank's valve went. Noob drops the gun, gun spins uncolltrolably on the ground.

Noobs scatter yelling things like, "Its gunna blow!" or "Take cover!"

It was like what happens when roaches scatter when you turn on a light.:D

[G-RaT?]

it was one of the first games of the day and everybody was going on the feild and a kid walked out there with his mask not even with him and the ref came running over and tackeld him football style!:laugh: I thougt it was pretty funny!

[Jr.]

i was playing speedball the other day and my dad runs around the bunker and stabs this guy in the back with his barrel, the guy yell im out, and the newbs in the back right see my dad and light him and the guy on there team out it was so funny

[runner31490]

It was 6 on 6 on the speed ball field and I was the last one left and there was only 1 guy left on the other team too, I didn't know it yet untill the spectators yelled 1 on 1 and all the sudden a guy comes out from the 50 and trys to bunker me. I ran out of my bunker and forced him into one and we kept running circles then I went to pull a pod out and the spectators are like hes getting a pod!! So I slam my lid shut and stand up and the guy is running at me again so I run and we both shoot eachother but no breaks then he ran out of paint.

dude always reload ur hopper befor you run out of paint, so when he runs at you when he sees you re-loading you still got a good 30 shots in ur hopper to take at him :D

[alpha20]

haha i remember it was me and my friends (who were equipped w/ impulses, timmys, ions, angels) against some other kids with basically the same stuff, they were just muchos snobbier.

well me and my friend take off running across the field to the other end, screaming and shooting everything that moved. they were too stunned to react, and although he got out, i stayed in and we won the round :laugh: .

[volcom0729]

friend was running towards the snake on a hypberall field, he was running like full speed and aparently not looking where he was going and runs straight into one of hte pipes.funniest thing..his hopper just falls off and theres a pile of paint all over the place around him.it was so funny, yet painful because its just a huge cylinder pipe.lmao...

[footballn62]

I got two stories one about some retarted noob, and me. Well the first one happened when my friends and I show up to the local field to get one of my friends HPA filled up and we see a game going on so we decide to watch it. Well it was 2 v 1. The 1 guy is some total noob, he looked like he was a major nerd with a BT-16 rental. He was behind a bunker and the two people stormed him. One had a nice Ion and the other had an electric A-5. They totally lit the nerd up and he jumped up and started yelling and he was walking off the field saying "I almost had ya guys" and I was thinking "Ya right" look at that nerd. And the last thing about me was we were playing a fun game of woodsball and I tripped over a root my barrel got like an inch of dirt in it and it took like 5 minutes to finally clean it out and get back to the game. Turns out when I fell I dropped my barrel condom and some other stuff I had in my pockets. Well I walked out of the field and I realized it then I had to go out and look for 15 minutes to find them and by time I came back everyone was just about ready to play a game of speedball because it took me so long to get back.

[Mentalmonkey10]

A kid that was about 4ft. tall and using all rented gear bunkered 2 ~twenty year olds in speedball... TWICE. It was kinda funny though watching him run across the field off the break and not even need to duck to get into low bunkers.:rolleyes:

Can you say "true born paintballer.":P

[GoGreenMan]

to put it in a "nut shell"...
He said "I got you in the mask, I saw it hit", I felt my mask and said " No you didn't" so we continue. After the game we are all walking out and some one is like "et me see your mask" so i look up at him and he dies laughing. Everyone all starts looking at me and laughing, but I am just standing there dumbfounded. We all rush off the field and I pulled off my mask and this is what I saw.......tell me what you think??!!
on the 3rd one you can see that it almost came in the mask.
http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/5913/pic01606mg.jpg http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/8993/pic01645mn.jpg
http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/7296/pic01626pf.jpg sorry if the pics are bad but they came from my cell phone camera.

[belvins]

Well this one wasn't while we were playing, but I have to say this. Ok, my cousins had just decided that they wanted paintball guns for christmas. They have a lot of kids like 5 or 6 I don't know I lost count lol but anyway, its pretty obvious that there not going to get angels or anything to to financial reasons. So my grandma calls me up and says, This is ridiculous, some of these guns get up to 48 dollars! It was hilarious haha.

[Canderous]

the funniest thing i have encountered? the boxers of a fallen comrade on the ground behind a bunker.

[belvins]

Oh my gosh I can't believe I forgot the legend...At our local field there was a kid about 11 and after the first few games we had realized that this kid was pretty good. He had a Pilot ACS. We started to keep picking him on our team. Then, After a couple games with him on our team, some rich little guy comes up to us (obviously a noob) and he has an Ion. I noticed throughout the day that this kid hid behind the same bunker every time and blind firing and finally somebody went up there and bunkered the kid. The kid screams. He was so mad that it sounded like he was going to kill someone, so the guy who bunkered him ran off lol, and the rich kids like, "Who shot me?! I'll kill em!" Obviously he must of closed his eyes or something when the guy bunkered him, hoping for the best haha. Anyway he points to the 11 year old kid with the pilot and is like "It was you! I'll get you next game!" so the pilot guys got this look on his face like yeahhhh right. The next round finally starts and the ion kids just puts his ion on full auto and just unloads at the pilot guy but misses them all (he had a horrible shot lol) and hides behind the bunker again for the rest of the game. Meanwhile, me and the rest of the team took out everyone but the rich kid, so all of the sudden we get all quiet. We all walked up and surrounded the kid and as soon as we do he throws his ion and hes like "I surrender please don't shoot!" So everyone accepted that this kid surrendered so we were just about to walk off and the pilot kid just points his barrel to the rich kid with his pilot on full auto and just UNLOADS on him an the chest and the mask. We determined It was around 12 paintballs that hit the rich kid it was so funny he was screaming bloody murder and just does a 360 with his ion on auto (6 people shot in that little incident). Everybody was like "Ugh I'm gonna get this kid!" 3 guys shoot the ionkid about 6 times more. Then the rich kid turns around to shoot the kids back but the pilot kid comes up from behind and shoots him in the back. The whole thing was funny cuz the rich kid was braggin the whole time and stuff...

[pouliot33]

i was playing paintball once...woodsball...and this guy was running and shooting and ran into a tree...no joke

[GhillieSuiteMan]

just today me and some friends went for some woodsball at his house, so there was one guy that it was his first time paintballing...So anyway, iIm pretty well hidden and he comes up and i raise my gun and i freak him out and he jumps for cover then slides down a hill we thought it was the funniest thing :)

[bratboy92]

i was playing @ challenge park extreme in joliet ill. and a guy just wanted to ask the ref if his gun worked or something and took his barrel plug and just shot the ref in the chest and the ref didnt care and the guy said oooppppsss and turned to me and said i did it on purpose.

[xtremepantbaler]

Today a little kid played in an intermedaite field that is very prone to head shots. And i had hit the little kid on the back of the head(he was running away from my team, cause he was bout to get bunkered)... I felt pretty bad.. so i found him in the parking lot and said i was sorry, and i guess he told his dad (which happened to be a an X-marine) that he got hit hard with a gun that was shooting faster that it should be..so we went to the Chrono station and i got my Tippy A-5 chronoed The Ref shot 5 shots... 293, 278, 281, 286, 273.

So the father was all like AH-HA see he was shooting over the limit he should be sent out of the park. But the Ref there was cool and was like no we go by the average, his average was below the 285 marker we set for our players. So him and the Ref argue adn the ref got really pissed off at the father and sent him home. The Ref then asked me what i had done after i shot the boy and i said i went to go apoligize, the ref then muttered "people these days, just take things too seriously" That was pretty funny

[sudballer]

We had just started the day, we only had one noob at the field that day and he was plagged all day by bad experiences kind of felt bad for him.

1. ok simple game of speedball in a city field style. not to mension that it was bear season. the kid runs and tries to make a house on his way there he slips in a pile of bear **** and ends up sliding into the bunker itself. that was a good fifteen min laugh.

2. we were playing attack and defend on the fort field and the kid was attacking i was posting on him in the far i stoped to pop open a pod fill my hopper and look up to see the kid booking in for a little square bunker maid out of wood as he goes to the bunker he over runs and knocks over the bunker. i felt kind of bad afterwards because i was laying a rope and the kid and....needless to say i got him out bad.

3. and last but not least we were playing a game of hamburger hill which is a big sand mountain with bunkers all around and a flag on top the defending team cant leave the top of the hill and the attacking team has to touch the flag. the kid is attacking this time and off the start we take out two of they're players. the noob is trying his best you know just shooting randomly and anywere. so then my friend lays a rope on his bunker. the kid gets scared and tries to run to the other side of the hill, when he trips over a stump and slides the rest of the way down the hill. he was caked with sand and old paintball gunk.

[theJesus1]

this was the first time me and my firends played paintball, and we we're playing woodsball. There we're three guys left on the other team: two who I didn't know and one who was my friend( for the sake of his dignity let's call him pablo). This was a game of CTF and these two guys had the flag and we're laying down hidden in some longrass. All of the sudden, pablo comes up behind them, panics and empties out on them point blank. So they we're out, and pablo used his last 20 paintballs to shoot them, so he was out and their team lost.

[paintspray44]

the first time i went paintballing we were playing the alamo game (one team defends, one team attacks), and my friend decided that it would be best to flank the alamo. i was trigger happy, and i saw something moving, so i started shooting. it turned out that the movement was the ref. i hit him a few times- the only thing i hit all day. he cussed, and i laughed so hard i stood up and got LIT UP!!!!!!

[SPYDERBITE]

My dad was with us and my friend chase started shooting. he hit my dad in the hand and he went to shake it off then he got hit in the head and the shoulder. i swear it was funny to see my dad in that much pain.:D :D

[kjpmkjp]

While i was reffing a game of speedball with some new players, these two kids on one team rushed to the 50 (being two doritos with a laydown in between) and thought a great tatic would be to hurl (our doritos dont have tiedowns) a dorito at an opposing player. They did manage to miss, get lit up and do the same sort of thing later in another game (yay for throwing snake pieces). I booted them for sheer stupidity after i explained it to them the first time after the Dorito incident. Since the bunkers caused no harm, it was quite entertaining to watch.

[banderson]

The first time I played at a tourney field was at this indoor place. So on like the first game of the day right of the break I run full speed with out looking where I am going and then whiel stilll running I turn to look just as I run in to a 10 inch steel I-beam. So it knocked me to the ground and I think that I was knocked out for a few seconds but when I came too there was like 5 newbs just shooting be as fast as they could because I never raised my hands to signal that I was out they just kept shoot...So I crawled off the field and had to lay down but after awhile I went back to playing...So the next week I went to the doctor and found out that I ahd a concussion and a stretched tendon in my knee.

The moral of the story is too not run your head into big hard objects.

[-Evilordie-]

Nice moral... hehe,

One time i was playing with a little kid with a ION and he was shooting hot.. like 290.. Well he came to bunker me but my backman shot a rope and he ran away, I snaped and shot him in the ***, he turned around mad as could be adn i shot again and hit him in the balls... Man was that fun.

[Mentalmonkey10]

290 isn't that hot, try 340 and actually geting hit.:P

I was playing a 4 V. 4 speedball match with a few friends on my team. Well, the field set it up where there were 4 standups across the middle making it so I couldn't see the opponets at the break. Well, after a little while, it turned into a 1 v. 2 match, with us being the 2. Well, my friend (newb) tries to do a run through and literally run's through the bunkers. It took him too long to get through and he got shot up a bit by the other guy. Then I won.:P

[oobob]

me and four of my friends went paintballing one day to an outdoor park an there were these three kids there who were using ancient guns and kicking our buttes. me and my friends always do speed ball but they asked us to have a game of woodsball so we accepted. when they were all set the two best people on our team decide too play a joke on us and walk off :pissed: while yelling that we were ready. immediatly all three of us run behind the same bunker but we were big guys so two of us are hit when we go to a different bunker. that left just my one friend who had one paintball left while three of there team come up in an arrow. i was laughing so hard when he got bunkered and i havn't played woodsball since

[qwertly18]

i was playin woodsball with a couple of my friends against this guy with this amazing a-5 sniper and sucky team mates well we were all behind one wall and i poked my head out and BAM i get shot right it the throat and the ref is just sitting there laughing at me it hurt pretty bad right after that i went out and bought a neck guard!! lol
BELVINS THAT STORYS THE BEST

[pigpower100]

This kid with an ion pounded my alpha bunker while I move up... just kept shooting and calling for his freind to move up on me... popped him from the snake in his side and he just stared at me for 3 seconds before calling himself out

[pigpower100]

Oh my gosh I can't believe I forgot the legend...At our local field there was a kid about 11 and after the first few games we had realized that this kid was pretty good. He had a Pilot ACS. We started to keep picking him on our team. Then, After a couple games with him on our team, some rich little guy comes up to us (obviously a noob) and he has an Ion. I noticed throughout the day that this kid hid behind the same bunker every time and blind firing and finally somebody went up there and bunkered the kid. The kid screams. He was so mad that it sounded like he was going to kill someone, so the guy who bunkered him ran off lol, and the rich kids like, "Who shot me?! I'll kill em!" Obviously he must of closed his eyes or something when the guy bunkered him, hoping for the best haha. Anyway he points to the 11 year old kid with the pilot and is like "It was you! I'll get you next game!" so the pilot guys got this look on his face like yeahhhh right. The next round finally starts and the ion kids just puts his ion on full auto and just unloads at the pilot guy but misses them all (he had a horrible shot lol) and hides behind the bunker again for the rest of the game. Meanwhile, me and the rest of the team took out everyone but the rich kid, so all of the sudden we get all quiet. We all walked up and surrounded the kid and as soon as we do he throws his ion and hes like "I surrender please don't shoot!" So everyone accepted that this kid surrendered so we were just about to walk off and the pilot kid just points his barrel to the rich kid with his pilot on full auto and just UNLOADS on him an the chest and the mask. We determined It was around 12 paintballs that hit the rich kid it was so funny he was screaming bloody murder and just does a 360 with his ion on auto (6 people shot in that little incident). Everybody was like "Ugh I'm gonna get this kid!" 3 guys shoot the ionkid about 6 times more. Then the rich kid turns around to shoot the kids back but the pilot kid comes up from behind and shoots him in the back. The whole thing was funny cuz the rich kid was braggin the whole time and stuff...
Great you have just participated in an unsafe activity and oh probaly put some kid off of paintball forever thank you for your contribuation to our great sport:rolleyes:

[belvins]

^ Oh my gosh this guy just completley destroyed one of the funniest stories in this forum. Good job.

[ir0nExpress]

Great you have just participated in an unsafe activity and oh probaly put some kid off of paintball forever thank you for your contribuation to our great sport:rolleyes:

Ehh, stuff like this goes down all the time, just no one says anything, and it does contribute something to this great sport, HUMOR. For every sport, there's always the guy that needs his *** put in the right place. This is one of them.

[mark98custom]

One time in a woodsball game this guy's cell phone goes off and we wait for him to get done talking but he never officially calls time out. well he stands up cause hes mad i think his mom wanted him to go home or something like that but he gets done talking and apparently his mom lets him stay. he puts away his cell phone and is still standing up. and then hes like ok lets go trying to say pretty much lets start over. and since hes still standing up everybody just lightes him up but most of us are pretty nice and he only gets shot like 10 times but one hits the grill of his mask and apparently he thought it tasted really bad and runs off of the field and startes bending over and preparing to puke but luckily for him that urge to puke went away and we just went on with the game

[pigpower100]

What if that kid had been seriosly hurt or made a big deal about it? that would be a nice little cloud over the game
try this
kiddo: Can i play paintball
MOM: No there all a bunch of stupid warmongers who think shooting people from 5 feet away is funny

some kids probaly gona copy this story and do it at his field and get kicked out
i know its 06ers we hate now but grow up

[Esp_Spyder]

Me and my friends first time I played speedball, and we went up against these two guys, one with a mag, other was a ref at the feild. One of the guys was behind a bunker about 8 ft ahead of me. He ran out in the open to try and bunker me, I poped out the top and shot him right in the arm (was wearing a t-shirt). He showed me about a week later and there was a ring of blood (probably spiked above 300fps).

One time me and a friend were playing woodsball, and he manages to sneak up behind me and shoots me like 6 times in the back. I was pissed off, mostly cause I let him get past me.

Another time I was playing woodsball, each team had like 6 players. So anyway we start playing and about 1 min later I got shot in the back of the head. I was like wtf how could someone get behind me already? Then at the end of the game some noob comes up and was like "oops I shot you, you were on my team". :pissed: :mad: God damned noobs, don't even know whos on there team.

[splatmania]

i was at our local feild playing woods ball and a game starts and im walking down a path and what do i see a mine plain as day set in the middle of the path, the problem with this is mines arent even allowed on this feild, so i start looking around and i see a little kid hiding in a bush about 20 yards off the trail so i act like i didnt see him and walk up to the mine and hold the triping pin in 1 hand and the mine in the other and chunk the mine into the bush with the kid and all i see is this bush turn bright green from the inside out and a little kid run out of it with his hands up in the air lol

[dyekid1578]

Today was funny I ref the experinced feild at the feild where i work. Well anyway it was around lunch and no one was at my feild so i grabed my gear and played the unexperinced feild. I did a ninja craw to about the 40 didnt get hit then i walked down the feild shoot the other team. It was funny i guessed youd have to be there to understand why. the kids where just like whered that come from. Yeah i love my job.

[Canderous]

Yesterday my friend tried to convince me that one kid at my field was using a "shocktech ion" because of a white body kit and a few shocktech stickers.

[IronCorps]

Yesterday this noob's outside the shop door trying to screw off his co2 tank. When he gets it about 75% off, and the gas line begins to clear (the hissing n stuff) he freaked out and yelled "Whats happening!?!?!" and he dropped is marker on the deck and stepped back as if it was dangerous. We all heard the gas line clear and him scream, and we all lawled for a while.

[belvins]

Yesterday this noob's outside the shop door trying to screw off his co2 tank. When he gets it about 75% off, and the gas line begins to clear (the hissing n stuff) he freaked out and yelled "Whats happening!?!?!" and he dropped is marker on the deck and stepped back as if it was dangerous. We all heard the gas line clear and him scream, and we all lawled for a while.

I remember when I did that my first time unscrewing my co2 tank, it started hissing so I dropped my xtra (I thought it was going to explode) in my backyard, ran into my house and left it there until all the air came out of a just filled 20 oz tank:D . I still jump whenever I hear that vaccum noise when you just put the co2 on and it enters the cyclone feed, I don't think I'll ever get over that one even though I know its coming.

[splatmania]

yea i think that kinda startles everyone when you here that

[Mentalmonkey10]

I got freaked out when I ran out of CO2 and it did the "full auto affect." I put it down on a chair outside and went inside really quick. I didn't come out until it was done.

[splatmania]

lol first time that happened to me i just grabbed the bolt and it was a top cocking so the skin on my finger got pinched in between the bolt and gun OUCH that hurt

[The Paintr]

LAst week i went to a family outing kinda thing. It was only me and like 5 other kids. 2 had tippmanns and the otehrs i 4get and 1 had an imagine....with a scope. It was halarious to play that day. The tippy kids were okay but the imagine kid was so funny. He would sit in the back and look through the scope and aim. He thought he was a "sniper". I had a great day

[Mentalmonkey10]

Paintr, I don't see how an Imagine had a scope on it considering that it dosn't have a bevertail or anything to connect it to of any kind. :eyes:

[AW-Nage]

Was at a field about 20 minutes from my house (liberty paintball), and my friends and I decide to finally move up. I go up front while he covers me. I sneak up by the side of a wooden shed/bunker, unnoticed and I see about 5 little kids (probably about 11 yrs old) trembling in the bunker. Friend stops shooting and they start to get up. I hadn't the heart to shoot them from so close, and I didn't think they'd know about surrendering, so i just ducked down and opened up on the side of it and they dive down, one of em hits his head on the side of it. He was fine, and I eventually managed to convince them that they were out.

[nocoolname]

well this is a center flag story but its great and made me feel good to

ok were play on a feild with a bunch of huge dirt mounds and some concrete pillers theres a big 0 cylnder in the middle with the flag in it

so we start the game my dad is playing with us and he tells my freind to move up and hell give him cover my freind moves right in front of my dads line of fire and is nailed in the neck from five feet

then out of no where some 11 year old kid rus up and grabs the flag idk wht this kid was thinking but he yells at the top of his lungs i have the flag!!

we have about 12 ppl on our side every one just turns and lights him up and the kid just lays there in a ball i think i wasted half my hopper on this kid (this is the first time i played by the way so we all have rentals cept this 1 guy on the other team with and angel)

so now i have like 10 balls left i ditch my gun and grab the flag the guy with the angel is now freaking out and eliminating evry one on our team he is standing up i go bak grab my gun in a cool agreesive slide and nail him in the mask he wipes but is called out (only noobs wipe) so now im running twords the other teams base at full speed i stop to c how far i am and i c a guy on the other side of the hill i get up and run i make the flag to the net and then out of no where im lit up like a ..... yeah

after the game the kid is crying and his neck and chest are all red and swolen i laughed forevr about it :laugh: :laugh: (yeah it gets to of em' its tht funny)

[belvins]

I don't know if this has ever happened to you guys but here it is-

GuyWith98Custom: Dang I almost had you guys if I would of had a faster gun I would have taken you out for sure!

GuyWithShocker: It's not the gun it's the player behind the gun.

MeThinking: So, if its the player behind the gun lets trade his 98 custom for yours..........

[dyekid1578]

This kid at my feild is horrible and he has this angel ir3 that he payed 500 bucks for like a week ago. that in it self is funny, but he let his dad borrow it for a game. Well his dad's team won and he was like dad the only reason we lost was becuase i didnt have my angel. This gun is sooo slow, not to mention he says it has a hair trigger to my friend who shoots a shocker and was holding it.

[Pballer freak]

im at a woodsball course and this 10 year old kid comes out of the car with his dad. he was so exited that he finally got to play paintball. :jumping: So wen he opens the trunk he gets out this starter kit rips the thing right open, loads the thing and puts in the c02.
He was so exited when he showedme his gun and his eyes were sparkling with joy.
so the game is about to start and hes pretty tense. but the thing is when the game started he couldnt fire his gun. Little did he know that the c02 tank isn't full in the starter kit :dodgy: . he goes "my gun is broken!!" and then pple just start lighting him up. he yells "ahh call 911 im hit!!"

i felt srry 4 the little guy and gave him my spare co2 that day :)

erm.....the end:D

[Nexxus]

I wasn't actually playing, but i was sitting about 250 yards away from the field. I was eating my lunch, when all of a sudden i hear 2 kids screaming for their life. I was like holy crap! When my friends came back, they said the guy with the PM6 came up to these kids and asked them to surrender, but they did not want to surrender. They shot at him and the kid said alright and unloaded about 100 balls out at these kids(ramping(illegal:dodgy: ). The kids come out and yell at the owners saying it wasn't fair, and that bunkering wasn't allowed. I have yet to see them come back.

[belvins]

im at a woodsball course and this 10 year old kid comes out of the car with his dad. he was so exited that he finally got to play paintball. :jumping: So wen he opens the trunk he gets out this starter kit rips the thing right open, loads the thing and puts in the c02.
He was so exited when he showedme his gun and his eyes were sparkling with joy.
so the game is about to start and hes pretty tense. but the thing is when the game started he couldnt fire his gun. Little did he know that the c02 tank isn't full in the starter kit :dodgy: . he goes "my gun is broken!!" and then pple just start lighting him up. he yells "ahh call 911 im hit!!"

i felt srry 4 the little guy and gave him my spare co2 that day :)

erm.....the end:D

You made that up. The ahh call 911 im hit!! gave it away.

[McCoolidge]

At my friends house we had a bunch of old furniture from his basement, like doors and stuff, so we decided to make a little speedball field in his yard. Well, we didnt make them too strong cause one windy day my friend was behind one of them and a gust of wind came and blew the door down and he got lit up horribly.

[maniac91027]

I met a noob before the match and he had no idea what he was doing and there was about 15 good guys and a b-day party. so when the match starts the little kid, wearing a life jacket, decides to follow me and i ran half way up the field. to my surprize the kid made it and when he took his first look around the bunker he got shot right in the neck, ouch! he was so clueless that 2 seconds later he took about another 15 painballs to the chest and head. LOL

[pbplyer_4life]

who cares if im upping a semi old thread


once it was this like 9 or 10 year old with a 98 custom that was almost as big as him
then there was this 15 year old with an upped ion.
So the 15 year old just shot out like 3 players and he was the last one in a 1 on 2. This is at bunker ball so he runs to bunker what he thinks is the last player when he gets pwned by the little kid and he wins. It was hilarious one of those things you had to be there

[paintudown]

ok, this stinks, i mean, our team was having practice (little skirmish) and although we dont typically bunker teamates (we divided the team into 2 groups), my best freind was playin backman on the other side, and it was just me and him. I decided he needed to be lit up now and then and went to bunker him. i decide to not hammer him from up close but i swerve to the left so i can put a few yards between me and him before i lite him up (im a nice guy;) he has no clue im coming) as i round the corner, he notices me, and instead of shooting, he jumps up and runs, i mean he hauls, i started shooting but i could not hit him ( i was laughing to hard) basically we traded sides of the feild without hitting eachother, and neither of us had the brains to grab the flag along the way.

couple hours later, still playin as team, me and the same guy get into another face off. We are both fighting to beat the other into the snake, whoever gets there first was almost guaranted the win. As i was about to make a break for it, he gets there first, so me being the genious:crazy: i am, i decide to lay down some supression fire and run in and bunker him, minor detail, as i start shooting, my bolt jammes:eek: he turn around and sees me behind him with a skrewed up marker, well oww, he won that round. I have the wors luk at bunkering ppl, i know.:mad:

[supguyex]

one time i was shot out, and i stood on the sidelines right? then all of a sudden, my cellphone started ringing and i just pulled it out of my pocket and shuved it into my mask and was like, oh hey mum, whassup? yeah that's gunfire. lol. it was funny at the moment.

this other time, i was test firing my gun and i shot this tree right? and there was this guy standing underneath it. i dunno how i did it, but i shot a branch off. and it landed right in his arms. yeah. kinda stupid, i noe, but still somewhat funny :)

[spyder imagine]

well one time it was me my friend and his lil bro against like 10 little 10 year olds it came down to about 4on3 well me and my friend werent even trying. then suddenly were all behind the same bunker im like im staying then my friend and i pushed his lil bro out of the bunker and he was nailed like 10 times by a bounch of noobs that dont let up when there shooting. i was laughing for like 10 mins then me and my friend decided to try so it wasnt long after that and the round was over. but u have to be there to really get the concept.

[Nor-Cal PBller]

me and my friends lit up an old chinese woman who was blind firing at a woodsball field

[Wolf2Jester]

Hi was playing in my feild that i set up and there is like a small Mobile home (campervan, caravan what ever you want to call it) and in front of there is a ditch.

there were 3 v 2 agingst us and my guy was just a freind that had never played befor of he was way back somewere.

so i crawled into the dich without them seeing me. 2 were behing the campervan and 1 behind the bushes jus 10 meters away form me.

they all start shooting and hit the kid on my team. so i was in this ditch and was about to move to the other side of the campervan when my phone rings everyone watching from the outside starts laughing and they all just run towards me firing i must have been hit 25-30 times.

at the end of the game i had 33 bruses.

[IronCorps]

your a **** sicko go die
Say goodbye to pbr jerk.

[M.C.E.071]

Ok, me and my freind were in these buildings on the second floor when the guy in front of me's pants fall down!

It was hilarious so I called my buddy and we were extremely close to shooting him in the butt.( don't worry, I don't tk)

He couldn't go up and pull them up because he would be lit up by snipers.

He had to go practically the entire round like that.

:P

[gunslinger64600]

onetime i was playing woodsball at my local field and right off the break i ran to a bunker pretty far up and when i got there i leaned up against the bunker and it fell down! i got up and ran to the nearest bunker as fast as i could. its a freaking miracle that i didnt get lit up

[Tabris17]

A ref asked if my 06 Cyborg was a Pimp. :dodgy:

[Cpt. Morgan]

This one kid kept getting lit up by a guy with a completely stock A-5 (cept for the tank) and after like 3 games of being hit by this guy, the kid finally fires his renter's gun at a guy with a Auto-cocker. The guy with the cocker just lets loose and does like 14bps and completely scares the crap out of this kid. Kid runs back down the alley way and down the speedball field right past the guy with the A-5 (was on his team this time) all the way to the exit of the field. On his way he was yelling "Look out for the guy with the machine gun". I found it very funny until the guy with the machine gun came around the corner... (lol... its true... If I didn't know better I would have said it was a machine gun).

[soccerjacks12]

I was playing 2 on 2 speedball and my friend had just got shot. I was yelling at him to check for breaks because he usually calls himself out prematurely. He caught the paintball in his sweashirt! That's not even the funny part as I was yelling at him the standup bunker fell over! I noticed and ducked as hundreds of paintballs flew over my head.

That wasn't even funny, **************. It's one of those gotta be there to see it.:dodgy:

[TimberGhost0417]

" You're out!! On you're *****!!! "
Hahaha
The person that got shot didn't go out at first because he was too busy dropping to the ground and feeling the pain. Hehehe

[irish_lush]

A few weekends ago I was out in the woods with the same group of regulars I normally play with, and we had two or three first timers with us also. My buddy and I seperated from our main group of our team to try to get a better angle on the other team. While we were way out of range of both our team and the other we came across two guys from the other team doing the same thing we were. All four of us dug in. My buddy was behind me trading paint with one of the other team's players, who was off to my right. I had a tree in between me and the guy so I was safe from him, but the other guy was directly in front of me (he was one of the first timers). He and I trade for a while, and I run out of paint. Instead of calling out, I continue to fire nothing but air at him, to keep him back away from my teammate. Everytime he stuck his head out I would fire nothing but air at him, and he would duck in behind the tree, scarred he'd get hit. This went on for about 5 min, until my teammate finally got hit and called himself out. After the game, all the people in the main groups came over and kept asking why they kept hearing blank shots over and over, once I told them what happened, no one could stop from laughing. Even the kid that I kept shooting at thought it was funny once he realized what was actually happening.

[fake ninja]

my funniest one was when i got shot in the hopper in the middle of the day, so I start walkin back off and my lid is covered with paint on the inside. So im like WTF and i open the hopper and the shot blew through the front of the hopper and the piece that went inside the hopper shattered about 150 paintballs.

The worst part was it was a gun i borrowed from someone else.:(

[sushibass]

my friend, who is not very good, ran down the middle of the field off the break against some friends who are alot better and on a team, shoots 3 then his hopper jams. THE OTHER PLAYER DIDNT KNOW! about a 10 seconds of shaking he finally shoots the last guy. you shouldve heard what the team said afterwards.

[Dynasty19]

Me, my bro and my freind are playing at a local paintball field....it was a few rounds in and both teams were getting more pissed at each other as each round passed....basically just complaining about wipes and bad calls...and during one round, me and my bro rush up and bunker some kid that was pissing us off earlier, any way being our imature selves we call the kid some choice words, the kid takes off his mask (yes during the game, thats what got me)...and appearently this was a girl or women. Yeah it was surprise, she was about 5' 4" and about 35 yrs old, well she called her husband over and with our luck hes 6' 5" and from what she told us he was an all state linebacker....(not sure if she was just trying to intimidate us...but his height already did) any way he walks up to my me and my bro and looks down and says..."WTF did you call my wife?" well it was about that time i almost crapped my pants, the ref runs up to find out whats going on the ladie explains and then the guy grabs me and my bro...at this point i figured we were about to die....but the ref saves our life with the quick comment "Sir, killing 2 kids gets you 25 to life", so the guy loosens his beastly grip and says dont do it again, and my and my bro had to sit out a few rounds....good times, good times

[runner31490]

^^^ if you still had your guns in your hands you could have just lit him up then when he lets go of you just rip the _____ out of him

[Dynasty19]

haha ill remember that next time

[pb2391]

yea my funniest moment was playin speedball at this old school speedball course in the middle of summer..... the field was made of old fifty gallon oil drums and plywood.... so you start behind this pyramid of oil drums on thier sides and the ref yells go!, then we just lit up that bunker, not even aiming for the ppl, and hornets came flying out of them every where LOL and the other team either had to run and get shot or stay and get stung, that game lasted a total of 30 seconds lol.

[Dynasty19]

hahaha ive had that done to me, except i was in a castle, the hornets were on the stepss done....cvering the steps and getting mroe pissed as the otehr team lit up the castle....so i had to jump of the castle, it was about 10 feet up.....i feel your pain

[Aslan2005]

I'm older and do fairly well in a woodsball game. So usually, by the end of the day, little kids flock to me. Well, this one little kid was following me around asking what he should do. I thought there might be a chance that he could make it across this dried up swamp and get behind the enemy without them seeing him. So I told him to run over to a spot and f he started taking fire, we'd lay down some cover fire.

So he did.

Turns out, the swamp wasn't so dried up. He fell down in the mudd and lost one of his shoes. While struggling, his mask fell off because he couldn't figure out how to tighten it. The ref came over yelling at him because his mask was off. I felt so bad for the kid. I begged the ref not to penalize him because it was my fault.

Fortunately, it all worked out. I helped the kid tighten his mask...he never got hit...we went on to do pretty well in the game. The only negative was almost half of one of his legs was covered in mudd up to near his knee.

[CaffeineBoy]

something pretty funny happened while paintballing with my school, albeit annoying. there were 3 of us against like 2 people on the other side. one of my teammates got hit and the other ran out of paint. so it was 1v2. my teacher was wearing a bright orange down vest, that might seem like a bad idea but when i shot her 3 times, they all bounced. i thought they broke so she called herself out so i went on to take out the other guy. annoyingly the ref let her stay in and needless to say she got me out. after the game i realized that the three shots i shot at her were the last 3 shots in my hopper!

[paintballluva]

on the scenerio field it was me a few of my friends that have played and a bunch of other really good players on the other team were like 16 noobs, so the game starts we get about 3 players out...then theres about 5 minuts of nohting...like most newbs they hid in hte back waiting hoping that we wont hit them too much :rolleyes: so anyways im about @ the 50 and i saw 2 or 3 of them...i didnt shoot them right away cuz i saw that there guns were on the ground...thats not the funny thing, the funny thing is that when i moved closer i saw they were playing rock paper scissor to see who would move up the field.....i laugh my butt off adn i just light htese guys up (using my friends ion) and hten after i shot the one guy a few times he almost runs off the field w/o his gun lol

[camerica19]

Funniest time I've ever had, was playing woodsball at the local junkyard. My friend anthony is really serious about paintball, and he gets rreally mad at little things. So he's hiding, and his phone goes off. Thinking its one of his friends. he doesn't even look at the name who called him. He picks up the phone and yells curses saying I'm in the middle of an F'n Game u dumb a$$. Turns out, it was his best friends mom trying to figure out where here son was. Yeah, that was funny.

[Mbsbl16]

funniest thing that ive seen was when I went to play paintball through a school field trip. Well the two teachers that accompanied us were both ex-marines who worked on nuclear subs (hence them being physics teachers). One of the kids in the school deemed "popular" but one of those cocky SOB's who has no real friends cause he plays everyone went on the trip. First game of the day, the marine teacher lit up the cocky kid in the balls from quite an impressive distance. Sure enuf, it was the kids first time so he didnt think to wear a cup. Ill admit that after watching him cry for a good half hour it became quite funny

[volcom0729]

yesterday, a kid buys 2 grenades and basically rushes up to teh 50 and chucks em and gets lit up.he ended up getting 3 guys to make it a 4v2 haha.

then another one on a woodsball attack and defend fort field, a guy basically took all his pods and put nades in place of them in his pack.about 10 total.and basically we put cover fire over him while he rushes up to the wall and lobs em over the wall.he only got like 2 ppl but it was funny as hell.he was saying how he was waiting for some tall guy to just peak over and be like whatup foo, and pop him on the top of his head.

[mongoosw1313]

Ok i went to my local woodsball field on and a group of Chinese exchange students come and we played the 30 of them on 15 and before the first game the owner came over and said "its like WW2 all over again" and then wlaked off funniest thing ever

[Neon Lites]

Once i saw a guy carrying his gun in one hand and a box of paint in the other.... guess he couldent offord pods?

[XxxWarheartxxX]

This was awhile back...

We were playing attack and Defend. We have a castle type structure and thats what you defend.

So the game is going on and there about to capture the base. So this guy yells "STOP STOP THE GAME OMG STOP THE GAME!" so evryone thinks someone is hurt so we all stop and stand up to look. This guy come out of the castle structure and unzips his fly and starts to piss. Then he runs make in and yells "OK LETS DO THIS SH*T!" No one started shooting or anything we just started laughing over nad over.

btw this game was 50 vs 50 so imagine 100 people laughing at one guy.

[paintballluva]

Once i saw a guy carrying his gun in one hand and a box of paint in the other.... guess he couldent offord pods?


saw a kid last time i played carrying little baggys in his pocket lol

[inuyasharox4776]

I was over at CPP when my pants started to fall on a sprint! (if anyone knows the field "trenches", I was running torwards the house on the top). The whole entire game i was trying to fix em but nothing was working. So I had to keep my legs separated the whole time to keep em up!:elaugh:

[soccerjacks12]

Today, 3 things happened:
1. I saw a kid using a rental w/ a VL Quantam and a Freak.
2. My newbish friend got scared cuz he borke an oring on his CO2 tank. He tried to unscrew, put it on the ground and ran away. He thought it might explode.
3. My other friend was the last one left. He was sitting next a tree and a guy comes up next to him on the other side, not knowing my friend is there. My friend tries to tell him to surrender but the guy can't hear because of his super loud ti[[y. My friend wraps around and shoots him right in the butt:laugh:

[supguyex]

today i went balling right? so i'm at the start bunker, i hear 20 seconds! suddenly, i feel something kinda strange around my crotch area. i look down. and my belt's undone itself. i'm like, ummm ok. so i try to tighten it and buckle it, and i pull and pull and pull, and my whole belt comes right off! i'm like SHOOT! then i hear go go go! so i run to the SNAKE! cuz that's the position i agreed on. i slide in, and my pants are halfway down to my knees, then i was tryin to shoot somebody with my phantom, i had to reload and as i pulled out my 10 round tube, i tried to pull my pants up, but that only made it harder. so i get shot out. and as i'm walking, my pants fall down and i'm sorta waddling back to the dead box. it sucked

[paintudown]

had it happen man, its ok, i was playin a snake to, but not stock class, and the weight of my pods pulled down my pants round my knees, i was snap shooting and tryin to pull em up at the same time, the reff was laughing his but off, ok, so it didnt work out well, im gettin madder and madder as they keep on fallin, finally im just like "shoot" put my gun on the ground, pull up my c4's and tighten the strap, the reff is on the brink of tears now, i pick up my marker, but one of my oppenents must have noticed something was wrong.... and came to bunker me.... i caught 4 balls b4 i could even pull another shot off. o wow... good times, im just lookin back and thinkin what would have happend if i got "crotched" with nothin but my boxers on.... wow...

so dont feel like ur the only one dude

[shadonite]

The funniest things that I've seen ever seen while playing paintball.....happened to me. I was hiding behind a bunker with about 6 people pinning me down. So someone comes around the side about 30 feet away and starts to shoot me. I was playing woodsball, but my speedball instincts made me push up against the bunker. Little did I know the bunker wasn't supported by anything exept for trees(it was only laying against the trees), so when I pushed up against it it fell down. So I'm looking at the 6 or 7 people that were just shooting me, and they're all staring at me. One of then screams," Shoot Him!" so they all just unload on me. After about 4 seconds of shock from my bunker falling, I grab the bunker and pull it back up against the tree and the ref was laughing the whole time. So he came by to check me for hits and ask if I was ok, and then he just busts out laughing. I was confused...then he goes,"Dude, you're still in they ALL bounced!" So he was sitting there laughing. While the other players were there waiting for me to walk off the field, but instead they see me pop my head out and try to get them. Unfortunatly, I was laughing too hard to shoot straight so I got hit in the mask and walked off. When everyone saw me in the staging area they were like "What? they all bounced!?" haha that was a great day.

[bam wannabe]

i was at the local field last summer, and i was at a back standup can on the airball field. well apparently they didnt inflate the can enough and it was collapsing forward on me. (bottom was too flimsy) so the ref came running up and was holding it up from the side people were shooting at me from. he must have taken easily over 20 hits in his back within a 10 second span.

i felt bad for him and ran from the bunker as soon as i could. later i talked to him and he said it was basically his fault, as he was the one who filled the bunkers with air.

[TimberGhost0417]

" Cover me I'm going to bunker that guy "

I'm run 70 feet and wrap around a sandbag X bunker.
I see the guy laying down and he doesn't notice me. SCORE!!!
Pop...THE SKY?!? THE GROUND!?!? THUNK!!!! what the...OH NO!!
Face to Face with the enemy!!!
I took one shot, tripped, my Ion flew away, and I landed right in front of the enemy. He was kneeling 1 foot away from me. We just stared at each other for a few seconds. Both of us were shocked at what just happened. :)

[Elite virus]

A kid on my team shot himself in the foot by accident before the game started.

[paintballluva]

that happened to my friend to, he didnt have time to wipe it off and he got called for playing on! (ref decides to pull me out :( )

[supguyex]

dude, that's not funny, that's just effing cold

[paintballer667]

Most people dont have broken masks for a couple of years, or even at all. You guys need safty cooridinators.

[kjpmkjp]

I've never broken a mask before, and i've taken so many direct shots its not even funny.

[next#1playr]

first time at this new field, there was 1 kid who looked and acted 7 or 8, and was SCARED TO DEATH of being shot. My friend went to the bunker that he was at and the kid starts frantically saying, "they are going to get me arent they? i dont want to get shot! Help me help me!!!." To make him quiet my friend told him that he was going to protect him. I was throwing him a pod, so he was turned around, and when he cought it, his gun went off. He nailed him in the back from about 4 in. with brass egeal paint, then the kick shot his gun again. All i hear is screams of FEAR, not pain, FEAR. He raises, and slowly walks out with his gun half-up, and gets LIT UP. We couldn't stop laughing.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA........ HA.

[next#1playr]

I've never broken a mask before, and i've taken so many direct shots its not even funny.

i took a direct one the other day two feet away in the face scared me half to death, but only once I was lucky see sig.

[Mokkie]

If it was me that gets slammed in the face with a hard metal object repeatedly...not only would I hunt you down after the game and unload my hopper into a certain part of your lower body...but I would sue. You assaulted the guy, even if he was your friend...thats bad man.

Anyway, lets see what stories I have.

My friends and I were playing a 4 on 4 woodsball game. Our gorup made it to the center when we met up with the other team. There was a 5 minute or so firefight. Then one of my friends on the other team decides to make a run through. He gets shot once in the pods (which the ref never saw) and once in the chest. So he's walking towards me with his gun in the air like he is out. But I noticed his barrel condom wasnt on and that he wasnt going the right way to the deadbox.

At this point he is about 10 ft away. So to be cautious, I ask the ref if he is out or not. He says no, the shot never broke. So I unload 3-4 shots to the dead center of his chest from 10ft away. He starts yelling at me, and makes the mistake of saying: "You (fatherless son), those shots didnt even break!" Sure enough, none of the shots broke. So now he is about 7ft away and gun pointed towards me (no barrel condom in). So I say to him, "Hey, your right" and proceeded to nail him about 8 times in the chest. Needless to say he was mad at me for the next 30 minutes :)


Here is another story, from the same day. We mixed together with another party and played a big 20 on 20 speedball game (It was a big field).

I made it pretty far up the snake side on the break. I was just about to move up to the snake as my teammates layed down some cover, but someone on the other team beat me to it. So for the next minute me and the guy are trading shots back and forth (from about 20ft). He eventually turned his attention elsewhere and forgot about me. I saw his mistake and made a run to bunker him.

Now, the field we played on that day uses a Surrender or die rule when it comes to bunkering. However, they dont yell if you bunker in bigger games or games with people you dont know, as they realize that the person may shoot you anyway, not hear you, etc.

So I come up and catch the guy from behind. He turns towards me and swings his gun around. I scream for him to surrender or die, but my finger didnt agree with my mouth. I shot the guy in the foot, thigh, (almost) groin, and hip. It turns out he was my friend, the one I shot (see above story) earlier. He got a little pissed again, and we started arguing. Now, we were both standing up in the middle of the game...and we both got lit up by both teams :P

[My Own Abyss]

This kid comes out of the pro shop all decked out in stuff he had just bought(Ion, Halo, 68/4500, etc, etc.) and randomly challenges me to a 1v1 speedball game. So I said ok. When the game starts, I run up to a dorrito and get ready. He starts shooting at me and he is ramping. I just stand behind the bunker. Out of all the stuff he bought in the pro shop, he didnt buy any pods.:crazy: So once he shot through the whole hopper, he didnt have any paint. I just slowly walk up to him and shoot him in the mask.

[Goldeneye7]

My brother one time was playing against two girls who had just started playing.He took one out and then he ran out of paint. But he got an idea!
He ran as fast as he could to her and said BOO!!!!:eek: She screamed and just ducked! It was so funny!!!!:D

[g35x]

my funniest one was when i got shot in the hopper in the middle of the day, so I start walkin back off and my lid is covered with paint on the inside. So im like WTF and i open the hopper and the shot blew through the front of the hopper and the piece that went inside the hopper shattered about 150 paintballs.

The worst part was it was a gun i borrowed from someone else.:(
whoa...what kinda hopper:eek:

[B.C.paintballer]

I have a few of them:

The first one deals with my cousin. We were playing Rec. in the woods behind me house and all of us had ran out of paint.So my cousin(the idiot) starts shooting himself in the hand.DO NOT DO THIS!!!!!!!!
Well, turns out that his hopper wasn't quite empty. The last paintball must have been jammed in, but then it fell out. Next thing we know, BAM!!!!. He was yelling and screeaming and we all start laughing our heads off.

Another one off the top off my head is when Me, my cousin(The same one) and my best friend were at my friends house. We started playing, and it was starting to get dark out. We were just messing around, and so me and my cousin teamed up against my friend. My friend was behind his pool, and I couldn't see him very well, so I moved up to a tree that was closer. my cousin was behind a tree behind me. so this is how it was set up.

o <-cousin
o<-Me


O<-friend
So we finally get my friend, and he yells that my cousin and I had to fight as soon as he yelled that My cousin unloads on me, but since I knew him well enough I had already dove to the other side of the tree. I just stuck me gun around the tree and fired, to send him behind his tree. So then I pop out and aim, but he does at the same time. He and I shot at the same time each shooting about 5 shots. Two of his hit my gun in the hopper and power feed. But we weren't counting gun shots. My five all hit his mask one after another, and when his head popped back out all I saw was paint. Although once we cleaned up, we saw that he had broke my powerfeed straight in half.

[Deathfrombehind]

i was watching a 5 on 5 of some girls who had never played befor andd were carying there paint around it was kinda funney one of the dads during this match ran up to a bunker he was going to and then ran around the bunker then into it im kinda supprised he didnt get lit up

the same day
when i was playing a guy came up and tried to bunker me but i saw him coming and reverse bunkerd him although he shot me 5 times and none broke...later that game i am the last one left and it is me against 5 and they bunker me from both sides and i fall over out of the bunker and get my mask lit up by everyone else while geting lit up from the other side...it was funney and hurt

[ICU117]

Funniest thing I ever saw was while playing at Hogan's Alley paintball in CT. There was this like 35 yr old guy there with an Angel Speed painted rasta style. He musta been trippin or somethin, but he would just walk down the field blasting away at people...Then when we went to play woodsball, there was another old gentlemen who had a tricked out A5 and special ops vest was walking around. And the rasta angel guy goes walkin up to the spec ops guy and just starts yelling, "YO GHOST...GHOST RECON WAZZZZUP!!!!" The spec ops guy was like...wtf are you talking about?...Might not sound too funny to yall, but you had to be there...

[kjpmkjp]

Funniest thing I ever saw was while playing at Hogan's Alley paintball in CT. There was this like 35 yr old guy there with an Angel Speed painted rasta style. He musta been trippin or somethin, but he would just walk down the field blasting away at people...Then when we went to play woodsball, there was another old gentlemen who had a tricked out A5 and special ops vest was walking around. And the rasta angel guy goes walkin up to the spec ops guy and just starts yelling, "YO GHOST...GHOST RECON WAZZZZUP!!!!" The spec ops guy was like...wtf are you talking about?...Might not sound too funny to yall, but you had to be there...

I would have done the exact same thing as the guy with the Rasta Speed. And yes, it's damn funny. Something tells me after tryouts on Sunday i will have numerous funny stories, and i plan on using the BOOM H3aDSHOT!11! on someone :dodgy:

[J0RD@N]

I havent encountered alotta funny things while paintballing but there were 2 times the first......I was a noob first time paintballing crappy rental kno idea what i was doing this kid who has been gloating all day about his awesome auto cocker runs out from the snake to try to surrender my freind. turns out someone spilled a hopper were the ego boy was running he slid from half way from the snake completely off balance and i shot him in the neck 3 times it shut him up. i was playing woods ball and in the very beginning of the game a saw a guy run into the shadows into a bushy area i forgot about him and focused on the 2 big targets noobs a guy that i absolutely hated was on my team so i told him to hide in the bushy area were a saw the first guy go a minute later a hear multiple shots like 20 rounds and a loud scream my guy got nailed 20 times in the chest around the same spot i was laughing so hard i forgot about the guy and he hit me in the hopper.......karma

[ballerdude]

I was watching a game of speedball waiting for my turn and it got down to one on one. The guy on the right team bunkered the guy from the left from like a foot away. As soon as the ref's call game the guy who got bunkered crouches and grabs his nuts. Everyone watching said ohhhh, then this old guy yells out "I know how you feel man." It was so funny.

[Toasty]

I'm older and do fairly well in a woodsball game. So usually, by the end of the day, little kids flock to me. Well, this one little kid was following me around asking what he should do. I thought there might be a chance that he could make it across this dried up swamp and get behind the enemy without them seeing him. So I told him to run over to a spot and f he started taking fire, we'd lay down some cover fire.

So he did.

Turns out, the swamp wasn't so dried up. He fell down in the mudd and lost one of his shoes. While struggling, his mask fell off because he couldn't figure out how to tighten it. The ref came over yelling at him because his mask was off. I felt so bad for the kid. I begged the ref not to penalize him because it was my fault.

Fortunately, it all worked out. I helped the kid tighten his mask...he never got hit...we went on to do pretty well in the game. The only negative was almost half of one of his legs was covered in mudd up to near his knee.

:D:D That is great... I am also older than most guys running around and little kids sometimes follow me around I don't mind sometimes but once I am like 10 feet from a bunker for the other team I am sneaking up and I duck down behind a log. Well the kids behind me see that bunker and yell :rolleyes: They all start shooting and damn if I don't get shot 3-4 times in the back from them! They were like 7 feet away too...I was like dudes aim a bit higher k?
Another time I was following some of my team mates and they jumped down in a stream bed I hear a shot and duck down...turns out the second guy had accidentally shot the first in the back when he jumped down :laugh:

[ycfan456]

Ok. So I was playing at my dad's friend's house from work. I had never been there before and there were two other kids there that I didn't know. I brought four of my friends who weren't very good at all. One has a stock Victor II, one borrowed my old Xtra, and one used my stepdad's Nice Pirhana EVO. (I don't like it) My dad (not stepdad) both had our A-5's.

Anyway, it was towards the end of the game and there were two "forts". They were really just piles of logs. It was four on four. (another guy came later) My dad and I stayed on defense and my friend with my Xtra and one of the guys I didn't know went on offense. (he is now my friend)

So my dad and I are sitting there, looking for the enemy. We hear sparratic gunfire on the other side. Our two guys had engaged the other two scouts near the enemy base. So we kind of sit back and relax knowing there is probably know one coming. Then we see a little kid carrying a flag. We thought it was the friend on my team. But it was the kid on the other team with the Victor II. He got scared over at his base so grabbed their flag and started hiking over to our base. He keeps getting closer and then he spots us. He freezes for about five seconds, drops the flag, and runs for cover. We shoot at him and he surrenders without getting hit. It is a common tactic for him. My dad and I grab the flag, plant it at our base, and game over. We later found that he didn't quite know the rules of two flag CTF.
:biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :biglaugh:

[LedZepp11]

The funniest thing I ever saw at a paintball field was when my friends A-5 just got an E-Grip, and the solenoid was screwed up. Whenever he set the gun down or jiggled the gun in any way it started shooting fully automatic. He had the saftey on, his finger was nowhere near the trigger. Finally, he just decided to play. It was really funny, the gun wouldn't shoot when he pulled the trigger, so he just ran out in the middle of the field with his gun going crazy and shooting as fast as it would go. Everybody on the other team was too scared to come out of their bunker, until he ran out of air, then he just got lit up. I was laughing so hard behind my bunker, I didn't even notice getting shot.

It might not be funny here, but you should have been there.

[fake ninja]

whoa...what kinda hopper:eek:
it was just a gravity feed.

[TippyBaller]

Ok, a few days ago I was paintballing at a friend's field. My friend and I were waiting for the rest of our group to finish the last game, well naturally we got bored and I decided to take a couple of shots at the kids still playing. Anyhow I put my mask on just in case, aim and fired 1 time yes just once, and i hit some poor sap in the side from 50ft thru a small grove of trees.:eek: I just bust out laughing and the newb comes over to us and hes like "did it break did it break?" Well it had't broken but we didnt tell him that so my bud pops a ball and smears it on him while hes doing a "paint check". omg it was so freakin funny and the whole time he thought he got shot from like 100ft away by another player. oh good times:D:D:D

[mousetrap]

My friend had a walnut fall on his head and he called for a paintcheck.

[Nade']

tippy ur so mean lol

[TippyBaller]

tippy ur so mean lol
I know, and the funny thing is that was the first time he has gotten shot

[OrangeBatman]

i was playing with my brother and one of my friends, and i shot my friend out so i went for my brother, he had never played before, and he had never been shot. so me and him are in a firefight and he leans out and i hit him in the shoulder, and he screams like a little girl, i mean at the top of his lungs, and hes about 22 years old, 6'2'' 230lbs, so hes a big guy, it was very funny, lol, i think he just wasnt expecting it though

[Superandy12]

I thought the game was nearly done so I do a run thru and find out the whole team is still hiding back there. my pants fall down and they all shoot me in the *** as a run (waddle) by.

[Nossit]

my friend went out and bought the "ungodly" pilot (lol) and the insanely fast rocking trigger(lol). So he goes and fills up his 20oz co2(lol) and comes back to own everyone. he gets on the field for 5 minutes and his spyder burps like crazy. recocks it and it does it again. So we find out it doesnt have co2 in the tank and we take it to get it filled again.

We come back and it still doesnt work and when i heard that out of co2 alarm system i take off running lighting him up. he gets so mad he slams the gun down and yells obscenties at it. it might not be funny reading this but it was helarious in person cuz he's a cocky mofo.

[SmudgeTippmann]

Funniest thing for me was it was 3 on 9 me,and two other friends against 9 12 year olds..We were playing attack and defend and my team was attacking,one of my friends got out and it was me and my other friend left, he coverd me and I ran in the building and all 9 kids surrendered.If they had brains they all cudda murderd me so easily,the reff in the game coudlnt stop laughing.

[Sly Independent]

i was playing woodsball and was swinging out and around to my right, and starting to come back to flank teh other team ( during this time i was wondering if they were stupid enough to leave their flank unprotected because i wasn't coming into contact with a flank guard) and you wouldn't believe it.....in a hole behind a fallen log is my good buddy Tyler sleepin away the afternoon.....i could have unloaded on him, but feelin nice i barrel tagged him.

[75RGT]

well we wernt playing yet we where cronoing our markers and this kid with a spyder had a remote line attached to his back and the tank was attached to a piece of cardboard shaped like a vest and when it was his turn to crono his gun he said "umm my gun is kinda taped to my back" it was so hilarious and also the tank was held on with duck tape

[Rocks_the_Woods]

Al Righty,
One day me and five of my friends were playing CTF in the woods. We thought we were all out. When we walked out we looked at my friend that was using a really crappy pump(he ran out of co2 for his semi) and we told that he wasnt even hit ( but of course he was shot in the back, we told him it didnt bust). Our other friends caught on to our joke and went along. They told him they would let get a 5 sec. head start to run. They both started shooting on full auto. He was hit in the back of the neck, both butt-cheeks, and twice in the gooch when he dove. I thought it was hilarious. To this day, he still doesnt know (yes we are good friends arent we?)

[Aslan2005]

I saw this kid with a nice A5. His dad was playing with him, they both had nice A5s. Anyway, before the game starts...his gun starts going off rapidly. He panics and takes his hopper off...so no more paint is coming out...then he tries to take the tank off...but panics and just jams the gun barrel into the ground (mudd).

The guns stops autofiring...the kidd pulls it out...and his dad is like, "great, now we need to clean your barrel out....let's go" So off the field they went. All I could think is, "I can't believe that kid just did that to his gun!" He just slammed it into the mudd and leaned on it! I guess Tippmanns are durable...he was back out there the next game!!!

[iconoclast]

A Halo B on a stock, mechanical Spyder Victor today. I laughed so hard.:D

[pbsniper111]

my friends bro was unscrewing his tank after his first day playing. i guess he didnt know that co2 sprayed out of the marker when the tank comes off. anyway, he unscrewed the tank and the gas sprayed out. he threw the gun away from him and jumped behind a tree and screamed at the top of his lungs. the gun he was using( one of mine) landed like ten feet away with the barrrel sticking into the ground. i was pissed that he threw my gun but was still laughing my *** off

[Mentalmonkey10]

A Halo B on a stock, mechanical Spyder Victor today. I laughed so hard.:D

I did something like that. My 'Cocker went down, so I had an Egg and a carbon fiber tank on a almost stock spyder xtra. (It had a SP Teardrop and CCM Feedneck)

[iconoclast]

I did something like that. My 'Cocker went down, so I had an Egg and a carbon fiber tank on a almost stock spyder xtra. (It had a SP Teardrop and CCM Feedneck)

Lol, that's understandable, but this guy said it was his only, and thus primary marker...

[slaminator3323]

A cow walked right in front of me as I was about to light some guy up, needless to say the guy was saved.

[a5ghilleman]

I was playing with a tracer. Totally ghilled and hidden in tall grass. My nehibor was walking about 10 m away. I took one shot and brok his feed neck. His eggy feel off his e99 and continued feeding balls out. it was so funny cause 2 rounds befor he bunkered me.

[joethemetaldude]

Okay so the last time I went playing paintball last summer... Me and some friends were on the speedball course. We had to split up the newbs between our teams. Low and Behold our team gets wiiiiped out and the last kid is left. Like a 9 yearold... He is crouching behind the starting board/dead box and my friend comes down the field bunkers him and lights him up... the kid just laid there quivering and crying his eyes out. It was funny and sad all at the same time. We really felt bad about it especially after he said he was never going to play paintball again...

[NH-Baller 101]

ive got quite a few.(most of tehm my friends being wussies)
1) Pinning my friend down so bad he ditched his gun and curled up in a ball.
2) Me and another friend shooting that same friend in the bakc so many times he was still running away screaming after the game was over.
3) My dad bunkered one of my friends and the kid looks up at my dad shooting him in the face and tries to get a shot on my dad. My dad shot him about 20 times.
4)walking back from a game and this kid dropped his mask and we all started unloading on it.
5) the same friend that got bunkered by my dad (justin) was climbing down a ladder. I asked him to surrender and he looked at me and was like "what" so i shot him in the face.

[NH-Baller 101]

heres anohterone on me this time
there were two people left in a 2 story bunker on the back of their side of the field. Me and 3 others are sorrounding it. I'm the best one there so i go to run in . right as i entered the backdoor a gun pokes around the corner from about an inch away. i tried to stop and get down, and since the floor was wet, i wiped out on my back, shooting at him as he is shooting at me. The ref jumps in between us, figuring someone was hit, and i scrambled back out , unhit.

[soccerjacks12]

You are a great friend:rolleyes:

[Brad_VG]

uhh ill leave this story short and sweet. We climbed into a watch tower and discovered human turds scattered all over the floor. Needless to say we climbed back down.

[soccerjacks12]

We were in the middle of the woods during a scenario game, and I had to go to the bathroom. SO I took a leak. During the leak, Aftershock rolled by(they sent them in to take us out, no joke), and I was running away while pulling my pants up. A very funy sight.

[Charles Lankfor]

I was out with my cousin and some friends at Jungle Island and my cousin ran out of balls so he asked another guy on our team if he could borrow some balls to finish the match. The guy gave him a pod and my cousin turned around and ended up shooting this guy in the ankles a few times from under a bus from about 20 ft. away. The guy came up to him after the match laughing. He couldnt believe my cousin shot him after he gave him some balls. The guy had nasty bruises on his ankles at the end of the day.

[DM5GUY]

Today, there were to brothers playing woodsball. They would stay on each others side and never seperate. So when i was watching them, the one would yell "Were you shot!?" and he would say yes. Then the other one would be yelling "Im out too!"

[Omniscient]

some kid decided to make his own harness out of a web belt and about 6 canteens. His tippy ran out of paint and he got lit up when he couldn't get the paint out.

[DokWatson]

If anyone here watches X-play, they would know special agent bob and steve, from the splinter cell spoof. Well, I was playing woodsball with some friends from ROTC, we were waiting for like 15 minutes, not moving at all...then he breaks the silence and says, "I have to piss." and im like, "Ill cover you." We bolth used our 'serious' voices, then I busted out laughing when I realised what it sounded like, special agent bob and steve on a mission, then one has to piss. I thought it was funny...you would have to have been there I suppose.

[Shadow Painter]

I have a friend who is really really sneaky... we were playing woodsball one time and he flanked me while i was reloading, made me jump and spill half my ammo... but somehow didn't manage to hit me... (i was dodging and trying to shoot back while spilling balls everywhere)

then he got lit up by my teammate :p

[Hawkeye1050]

one of my funny things was a guy that brought his brand new camcorder on the field to record some woodsball games. Normally, u think, ok, hes off to the side no problem. well, this guy was not off to the side. In one game, it was me against the LAST guy on their team. All of a sudden, i see TWO people running at me. I couldnt tell which one had the camcorder, since each of them were holding two black things that were pointed right at me. So i lit em both up with my ion. Turns out, i shot the camcorder in the midst of the fight. Anyway, he starts screaming at me, and i explain that he should have been off to the side, other wise i might mistake him for a player like what just happened.

[rodeoballer]

Ive got one. last week i was at my local speedball field and in the middle of the match my team was winning so i run up to a bunker in the middle of the field i look over and see someone on the other side so i surrender him then i run up to the back left can and i surrender the two people behind it one of them walks off to the dead box and the other one freaks out and falls against the wall with his gun in the air and people on my team diddnt know i surrendered him so he gets lit up and he was so scared he was shooting in the air and he diddnt know it.

[Lastman]

My team (noob team including me) were on a hill over looking the other team, in a huge paintball fight, we can't move backwards (rules) and are funneled so the fighting is in 1 area. The other team was full of guys with their own guns and mods, we were mainly rental guys. So me and some other guys were in this bunker over looking the enemy team.We can't look over the bunker because we will die instantly there was so much paint being thrown around. There were holes in the bunker though so we could shoot out of them at bunkers to keep their heads down. The hole I was shooting out of was barely big enough for me to manuver the gun and aim. About 5min after being in that game a sniper (crazy as its sounds thats what happened) got me in the face mask,though that tiny hole, about 60 ft away. I stand there for a moment and think, lucky shot. A second later a torrent of paintballs go though that tiny hole and hit me as I am standing up. And people wonder why I want my own gun

[Cainnibl]

I don't have alot to share cuz I'm pretty much still a noob but here it goes...

The first (and only) time I was at a field (with a bunch of friends for a batcher party) I had a rental (98c) for the first half the day and while walking onto the field for the 2nd game I decided to crono the thing to see if that would explain why the paint was dropping so much... well 214 and 211 kinda gave a good idea what was wrong I figured I'd deal with it later and just try and have fun on this village game. [side note] we had just got done playing a woods ball game and were used to the warning of balls hitting branches when you were taking fire. [back to story] So one of my friends gets this great idea to keep from getting pinned down in the back of the field, as soon as they say go we run up as far as we can and as soon as we start to take fire (thinking of woods ball) grab a bunker then try and slowly work our way up by covering each other and slowly advancing.

"GO!!!"... we run about a third of the way up the field and both take 3 or so rounds the chest and walk off and say "that didn't work so well.. lets not try that again."

So after end game and everyone switches sides we decide to take a better idea of working up the far right side bunker to bunker that way we only had to worry about fire from 2 sides instead of 3. This is working well until me and another friend are kinda stuck in a bunker about half way cuz the other noobs in the bunker across from us are blind firing and wiping there hopper hits (I saw paint break on hopper at least twice)... well at 1 point I look diagonal across the field and see a guy in a red shirt ducked down behind a reel (reffs wear red on this field) I didn't think much of it and went back to firing on the bunker... a min or so later I look again and he is still there only this time he has a gun!! turns out it was just a player in red. So having a clear shot at him and getting nowhere with the hopper wipers in the bunker in front of us I turn my attention to the kid in red. Now he is a good distance away and my rental is shooting 214 fps so I'm just about shooting at a 45 deg. angle well it takes me about half a hopper just to get him to notice me but when he does I see him turn and look right at me and next thing I know about 6-8 balls come crashing in or around my window sending me ducking as fast as I could!!! But neither one of us hit each other and he moved. So now I'm back on the bunker again and it was quiet... no signs of life in the bunker so I tell my friend "I think they are all out and gone." So he makes a run for it. Next thing I know he is curled up behind a small spool between our bunker and theres screaming to me "THERE NOT GONE! THERE NOT GONE!!!!!" So now I'm rolling around almost and dumping the rest of my paint all over there bunker to cover him for the run back. It was funny as hell to see him all sucked in to make himself smaller.. this was only a 24in spool he was behind.. I don't even know what the point of it being there was it was so small. Good thing he's a small guy.

Shortly after that I'm all out of paint. And I'm trying to decide if I want to just go out or try and draw someone’s fire and bring them out for my friend to shoot them. Then one of the guys in the other bunker runs up screaming like a mad man and shooting from the hip as he runs past our door way missing us completely then someone else out side takes him out. I laughed again cuz how lame do you have to be to be running up to bunker someone while screaming and shooting from the hip acting like some kind of bad *** scar face wannabe.. he did everything but yell "say hello to my little friend!" all that just to miss a guy that was out of paint then get shot... serves him right, for all I know he was the one wiping my paint off his hopper.

After that I say oh why not and tell my friend I'm out of paint and gonna run.. when they pop out to smoke me shoot whoever you can. I run and take 4-6 rounds in the chest and one on the hand. just as I'm passing there bunker with my hands up I hear my friend yell "your out your out!!" and as one of them walks out I make a comment to him "I don't know who it was but I know I had at least 2 hopper hits on you guys." He pulls his rental up and there is a nice pink paint smear across the front. He didn't say a word and kept on walking.

After everyone else is done and we are on our way out I see the guy in the red shirt... it was a skinny 12 year old kid with a rental. (keep in mind I'm 33, 6'3" 220lbs with long hair down to my waist, prob. look very scary to this kid). I point at him and say "YOU!" he looks at me all scared and I say "that was me way over there, I must have wasted half a hopper just to get you attention and as soon as I did you sent me ducking for cover with about 6 well placed fast rounds! Nice shootin man!" and I kept walking.. he was speechless. I think he was worried I was gonna kick his butt or something.

It was a fun day up until the opening of the last game of the day when I had a ball bounce of my left nut making me worthless for the next hour.

edit: one word.. spellcheck
.... a few more words... I guess I don't know the meaning of short and sweet

[splatter effect]

jesus dude you wrote a book. My god. lol

This story may not be funny but you had to be there i guess.

I was on a team with 2 friends and me and stew( my other friend) knew we were getting flanked. We took off up the hill to see if we could find them to pick them off. Well i guess my other friend tim decided to stay where he was. Long story short we hear a bunch of screams i guess he got shot in the ***.

[GamecockFn2]

I awnsered my cell phone while I was playing.

[splatter effect]

Hey you dont wanna miss an important call y. not.

[evokid]

Funniest thing for me was it was 3 on 9 me,and two other friends against 9 12 year olds..We were playing attack and defend and my team was attacking,one of my friends got out and it was me and my other friend left, he coverd me and I ran in the building and all 9 kids surrendered.If they had brains they all cudda murderd me so easily,the reff in the game coudlnt stop laughing.

ahaha joey, u would never have the balls to do anything like that. u would be to busy 'camping' out either a)behind the building, b)some place that out of bounds, or c)in the staging area.

[eroc1911]

I was playing at an unfamiliar field, and during I was being shot at so I was running to take cover in a circle of sandbags about four feet high. As I dove over the sandbags I noticed that the circle of sandbags was actually a foxhole that was dug an additional four feet, which made my fall in the foxhole a total of about eight feet, when I hit the ground My hopper spilled all over the place and I banged up my elbow, immeadiatly the refs came to see if I required medical attention, I felt like an idiot. Despite my jump my team still managed to pull off a win, probobly because the other team was laughing too hard to play sufficiently.

[iridespyder]

I went paintballing with my church and everyone was scared cept me and 3 other guys out of like 25. When we get to speedball about 8 people quit cuz they are scared out of their minds of getting hit and the rest just camp behind the bunker in the back until theres about 1 or 2 people left. After the first speedball game i knew everyone was scared so I said to this kid with an ion(he was one of the people that wasnt scared of getting hit) we should just bunker all of them right off the break so right when the ref says go we start screaming run past the 20 and just start lighting people up. It was the funniest thing in the world because like 10 people surrendered and then I got shot. I left the course ant shot one shot into the trees and it turned out that i had absolutely no air in my gun!!!

[Nemesis2k4]

i was playin in a tournament a Headrush (NY) and these three kids were up against us. they had mech spyders side feeds and no elbows...while we had imps and an ion...the told us GL cuz wed need it......we got on the field and within 15 secs one kid fell on his face, the other slipped and fell and i gave him a nice bonus ball in the jewels..>.<...and the last persons bunker fell down and he got anihalated...lol

[Nemesis2k4]

heres a really good one...i went to Syracuse, NY to watch my friends play in a big 3 man tourney... there was this one guy on one of the teams that i just thought was hilarious to watch. it was some 250 pound guy with a silver windbreaker and jeans...everytime his team would get out he would drop his gun and run off the field screaming im done! lol lol lol

[Nemesis2k4]

oo ya when i went paintballin for the first time i had a BE Talon and of course as u all no too well it blows. so i used it as a FLAMETHROWER aka PAINTTHROWER!
just pump as many balls as u can in the barrel and fire!!! HAHAHA

[fake ninja]

it was the end of the game, and the last guy got shot and didnt call out or get his gun up. he just walks out of his bunker and gets shot in the throat. He throws his mask at a rock and cracked it so he couldnt play the rest of the day. it was one of those you have to be there for it to be funny moments

[maxxa1221]

The funniest thing was when their was this 10 year old kid, and this 40 year old guy going one. They were the only 2 left. The older guy felt bad and went to barrel tag him because he didnt want to bunker him, the kid freaked out so much he dropped his gun. It was pretty funny to watch.

[KuNgFu-JeSuS]

So far the funniest thing that happened to me while paintballing was when we were about to start a firefight game, pretty much the same as speedball but with more ppl and in the woods. well we were about to start and a guy on my team with an ion was kinda scared of getting hit, so when the ref blew the whistle he just dumped out his hopper:laugh: .. and the refs were laughing and wouldnt let him leave, kinda cruel, but he never got hit..and we won :D

[Cainnibl]

wow... I never knew there were so many people that are THAT AFRAID of getting hit. It's not that big of a deal really unless your hit in the jewels or not wearing a mask. So it makes me wonder how someone is gonna spend money on a nice marker even tho they are afraid to play.

I'll never understand some people. LOL

[splatter effect]

yea. i just brought 2 friends with me who've never played b4 paintball. and they werent that afraid. they played right away with rentals.

[413sonix]

I was playing a game a few weeks ago and I play back so my friends with the Ion and Electra move forwards while I stay behind along with my friend with a MR1. Well I decide to move forward but I guess I didn't duck enough because I got gogged. So I go to the deadbox which is a tree house and I'm just watching the game. Well my friend with the MR1 eliminates someone so he decides to move forward to my friend with the Ion. My friend with the Ion is fat so he runs out of the bunker knocking it over and they both get lit up. It was pretty damn funny. Our team lost the round because my friend is dumb enough to not buy a pod harness but he buys a Electra and HPA tank with a Revvy.

[m98sniper15]

I was playing a 5v5. I did a dead man's walk and rear flanked the other team to win the game


m98sniper15

[speedball man]

maybe not exactly funny but it is this one boys birth day party and i am a part time ref and im watching one pro named sergio for the assasins he asked the kid how old he was he said 10 the they get set on diffrent teams then sergio puts his gun on full atuo the its 3 2 1 go!!!!!! people get shot then it is a one on one sergio has an open shot but the boy was playing smart and went around comes behind him and gives him 3 pelts on the butt crack.

second roung sergio dosent hesite and unloads 10 on the 10 year old game over the kid comes out crying