You know someone is a n00b when ________

[SEPHIROTH_086]

Finish the sentence and that's it!!!!

[Blazestorm]

They try and piss on the field?

[SEPHIROTH_086]

Ummmm I consider that some damned hobo confusing a tire bunker for a first class toliet...

[TheBeardedFrog]

talk about becoming a sniper in paintball

[sephiroth2666]

you know someone is a noob when they refuse to play on someones team for a game because they are "way too good" and "that person sucks" oo soem time agao soem noob i didnt even know showed up at my house with some of my friends friends and he thought he was the greatest painballer ever and he wants only the best on his team. needless to say i snuck up on him and shot him like 20 times form ten feet away it was hilariouse i thought he was going to cry. i know im a bad peson but it had to be done. oh and my teamate said that the kid was stealing peopels apint when he was eliminated before anyone else. i hate people.

[sephiroth2666]

TheBeardedFrog cmon that one goes without saying we all know that one lol

[SEPHIROTH_086]

Next time shoot the paint steelin' bastar* 20 more times for me, i'll pay you back the paintballs sometime later:P

[CDietz]

Originally posted by Blazestorm
They try and piss on the field?

hey thats not fair, lol. on sunday i had to do (not during a game though) that bc of a monster crap in the port o potties. and im not a noob, ive been playing for 4 years

[halB]

you know your a noob when the only guns youve heard of are brass eagle and angel

[falconman281]

CDietz thats only because you played once and just want to be apart of this forum

[CDietz]

yea, thats exactly it :eyes:

[The Mafia]

....they buy all their paintball gear at Wal-Mart.

[Down the Line]

you bash noobs when we were all once one. (i.e. this thread)

[Blazestorm]

I remember when I was scared ****less of getting shot... I mean if a paintball came NEAR me, I'd call out

[The Mafia]

lighten up dude...it's a right of passage. some day today's noobs will be good and they'll bash the noobs of the future. The tradition continues. It's like a fraternity and the noobs are the pledges.

[Down the Line]

I'm just saying I know alot of people who had no desire to play after their first time out because people were calling them noobs and not helping them out at all. Paintball is a confusing sport even off the field.

And what makes you think you aren't a noob? Your last thread was dedicated to the fun of shooting little kids :laugh: j/k

[halB]

honestly, i think u should take that jk out, hes giving the sport a bad name, who knows, he coulda made the next bob longs first game so horrible he quit paintball

[The Mafia]

If you go and actually read the thread, you'll see I was just kidding Hal. Calm down...the "future Bob Longs" are safe.

[Lord Reef]

Is it just me,or is Hal just a liiiiitle too serious?

Oh,and you know someone's a noob when you hear them say:"I dunno,just look down the barrel..."

[Renmazuo21]

How else are you supposed to see if its loaded :confused:

[alex]

Originally posted by Lord Reef
Is it just me,or is Hal just a liiiiitle too serious?


quit shocking actually

you know someone is a n00b when the pic paint off the ground( ive seen this done many times)

[Devastator]

You know someones a newb when they talk big about themselves and yoou can STILL sneak up behing em' and maunally break the ball on the back of his head...

[tryggerhappy]

Shucks..Golly Gee..uh..I GOT ONE!

U know someone's a noob when spent $300 on they're gun but still only blind fire.

[Villhime98c]

you know somones a noob when they put camo pace paint on, and pick paintballs up off the ground.

[Devastator]

You know someones a newb when they go in wearing all black to a night game yet still fail to remove the glow in the dark decal from their gun

[reneirwolf878]

u know some1s a n00b when they call eliminations or tags "kills" :) hehe

[133+ Player]

Originally posted by halB
you know your a noob when the only guns youve heard of are brass eagle and angel

Whats an Angel?:D

[Jaws.ca]

. . . They use a phrase like "I bet that gun hits REAL hard."

. . . I shoot five of them in one bunker.

. . . They "multi-bunker" even after I told them not to, which leads to a historic session of "I told you so".

. . . They run to a bunker, and end up on the side of incoming fire.

. . . I spend at least five minutes telling them how to survive in the game for more than 30 seconds

. . . at The end the day one perfectly clean, has no slashes/kils all day, has shot off all his rounds, and is Cowering in his bunker every time you see him on the field. ???

[Shadow221]

Originally posted by Down the Line
you bash noobs when we were all once one.


You do realize noob and newbie are 2 different thing right? a newbie is just someone new to the sport. a noob is usually a newbie but the are also narrow minded, think the sport revolves around them, think that they are gods gift to paintball, refuse to believe any gun they don't own or don't plan to own is any good, spread/make rumors that have no bearing on reality(i.e. they hear mags are blenders so they tell all their friends mags suck 'cause they are like blenders and break lots of paint), they get their parents to buy expensive guns(ex. angels, e-mags, custom cockers...) beacause they think they're too good for a "low-end" gun...

the list goes on.

[ffry]

Originally posted by Blazestorm
They try and piss on the field?

hahahaha, my friend alex had me cover him while he pissed behind a laydown, it looked like he wus hu mping it because he wus all tight up to it and laying down lol.

ok bakc to the subject.....

they ask you if your cocker is "the new IR3"

[halB]

Originally posted by The Mafia
If you go and actually read the thread, you'll see I was just kidding Hal. Calm down...the "future Bob Longs" are safe.

YAY! actually wait, ill have to compete with them, SHOOT SHOOT

[Moose]

when after a day of no eliminations (sitting in the back bunker doing nothing) they think to themselves, "I've played all day, and haven't gotten shot once! I must be as good as the pros!"

there was a kid at my field who said that

[VeNoM]

when they ask "whats a chronograph" . . .

"hey, look there is free paint on the ground!"

"You can't use that gun! that's not fair!"

"wow you must be a professional"

"what are those things under your barrel?"

there is just so many things they can say . . . they should have a show like that cosby one but instead of kids it'd be - "n00bs say the darndest things"


and i agree with shadow, noobs think they know everything and are the greatest, newbies are new to the sport and want to learn.

[kent]

When they are decked out in rental equip! and camo!! haha jk for all you woodies out dere:rolleyes:

[Villhime98c]

you know someones a newbie when they remove thier mask after they have been hit.

[halB]

when they wear chest protectors

[sephiroth2666]

hehe i love seeing people at speedball fields wearing camo im the jerk who comes up to them and is like "dude where did your legs go?!?" lol its funny i can understand wearing camo though because they have nothing better to wear you know.

[Trinot]

Hey I wear cammo in the winters when its 30 degrees outside because it keeps me warm. And there nooo way im wearing a jersey out in that weather.

[Devastator]

I think camo is kinda dumb unless the only thing your gonna be in is a bush. You stand out in trees and oh yeah, anything that ain't a bush. I have a mil. camo jacket and the thing is comfy as hell and is warm in the colder weather and is dark too, so its works in corners AND bushes.


"hey, look there is free paint on the ground!"

5 seconds rule :D (also where it lands)

[Six Feet Under]

There was this kid that was at my home field one day, and he said that he was going to go on this secret "mission" (and yes he was a newbie), and he was talking so $!&# loud that the other team could hear him and he got lit up (it was a 10-yr old with an Angel, a Crossfire 68 ci 4.5k psi nitro tank, and a vl 12 volt his Parents bought him:pissed: ) It was so $&!^%*& funny because he was acting all macho and everything and wham! This kid with a spyder compact 2k and a 20 ounce tank and vl 200 took him out (another newbie, the kid with an angel got shot like 15 times before the ref pulled BOTH of them ahahaha )

it was so &$%^!#*

[sephiroth2666]

theres nothing wrong with wearing camo in the woods.

[tonysk83]

yoyu no someone is a n00b when they surrender when no one on the other team is near them

[kent]

you know someone is a n00b when they post a thread about n00bs

[SEPHIROTH_086]

You know someone is a n00b when he refuses to go along with the thread and be a rebel and try to stand up to all of us:eek: HOW SPOOKY:D

[CDietz]

shorten your sig! and no, its not funny

[Blazestorm]

That sig is WAY too long, and when I was a n00b I actually did do that once :crazy:

[Devastator]

That story is way too long. I dont think it anyone wants to see it but you, in no way is it funny or even remotely come close to hvaing a point. Putting "I like biscuits" in me sig is funnier and more meaningful that the 50 line monstrosity! :pissed:

[Devastator]

Is mine too long?

[pboutlaw]

they ask if your stock spyder compact is an autococker.

[SEPHIROTH_086]

Ok ppl I shortened my sig, am I cool now:( :confused:

[QtRKoReaN]

When they still think it is fun to call others n00bs.

[PMI_Guy]

they bring a brite purple gun to the feild and wear camo....

[the other one]

Originally posted by PMI_Guy
they bring a brite purple gun to the feild and wear camo....

I really love that! it happens so much, and they stick out like sore thumbs! it makes me laugh. Anyway...

when they don't wear camo to a woodsball game.

PS: i have gone number one AND number two on a big wooded area that we played backyard ball on. i got shot at right as i got up from my "squat"........... if anyone quotes me on that i will deny it.

[reneirwolf878]

a lot of people dont wear camo at wood games. they have their jerseys or they wear t shirts it doesnt matter

[SEPHIROTH_086]

They dress in black entirely and act like snipers trying to hit you with their pro carbine and scope

[SEPHIROTH_086]

They think that all pump guns suck, and stock class players' Palmer Stock and WGP Sniper guns cost as much as their tigershark, talon...

[SyntaxErr0r]

Originally posted by SEPHIROTH_086
Ok ppl I shortened my sig, am I cool now:( :confused:

lol that was directed towards me. i wasn't being funny, I was sent to see whether ur mods would notice or not...


and shove ur "i like biscuits" up ur ***, thats even less funny

[SEPHIROTH_086]

Bah I like my shotened one more anyways, ummmmd o you often get syntax errors on your calculators or something?

[Shadow221]

sorry The Other One, but I had to. A post that funny just can't go un-quoted.

[monkeybacon00]

You know your a noob when you go to bunker someone and your not sure that they are even there! some kid went to bunker me yesterday, i had been in the same position in the snake for the whole time i was in there, he went to the opposite end and yelled "SURRENDER OR DIE!!!" i said "what?!" , and when he heard my voice at the other end of the snake he screamed some naughty words and bolted down the field. Thing is, it seemed like he was running for another bunker about 100 feet away or something, lol he could have easily stopped at a nearby one. Needless to say I hit him a good 3 times, once in the back of the head :D

another to add to the list:

You know your a noob when you see monkeybacon's RAT and ask him, "Hey when did you get the angel?"

lol, that was about two weeks ago, coming from a guy who had been using an imp for about 4 months, who ALSO had no idea what the dwell was and had never touched it and had to ask me that same weekend, no joke.

[pbjunkie06]

you can tell ther a nooB when they never move from there bunker the whole game they either not shoot at all or shoot all there paint into a tree that is no where near the opposing team
when a ball hits there bunk they jump and scream ow
when they always blind shoot
complain that your too good
or that your gun is to good
say there next gun is an angel when there scared of paying with their spyder sonix
have to have 30 layers of clothes on to play
and many others

[Blazestorm]

So I guess I'm a n00b.

I never move from my BACK BUNKER the WHOLE GAME, because I AM A BACK PLAYER, and since the spot I'm SHOOTING at happens to be RIGHT next to the BUNKER and I shoot ALL MY PAINT

when a ball DOES hit my bunker I DO JUMP AND SCREAM, like a monkey cause they can't hit me and only my bunker

I always blind fire... when I'm looking

I complain my gun is too good

I complain I'm too good

My next gun will be an angel most likely, and I am scared of playing with a spyder sonix

And that 30 layers of clothes is really 2

WEeeeeEEeeEEeeE I guess I'm a n00b!

[UTLadiesMan]

... they stick the tip of their barrel through a small hole in their bunker for the whole game. (Ok, I've seen some non newbs do this too, and it still seems wussy)

... they blind fire constantly, then complain how much it sucks to be called out because their equipment was hit.

[Blazestorm]

I don't mind being hit in the equipment (unless they hit my gun, tank hopper, pack or mask barrel or regulator)

Wait that is all my equipment!, actually if your stupid enough to have your gun or equipment out long enough to be hit, then you deserve to be called out, such as I was holding my autococker right out in the open (while sprinting) and it got wacked by a string of sweet spot paint :( So I simply called myself out

[SEPHIROTH_086]

You know thier a n00b when they try doing Matrix/Max Payne moves on the field, NO JOKE last week some kid was moving up then he noticed there was a guy and you seem him jump back and was like lieng down i the air firing, next think you he hits the ground hard as hell, it was damned funny weve took the oppurtunity to give him the nick name Neo:D

[halB]

Originally posted by UTLadiesMan
... they stick the tip of their barrel through a small hole in their bunker for the whole game. (Ok, I've seen some non newbs do this too, and it still seems wussy)

... they blind fire constantly, then complain how much it sucks to be called out because their equipment was hit.
i dunno bout that hole thing, i once took out everyone trying to get the snake from a hole in the spool, first time anyone played that spool field, first time they made the rule ya cant shoot out of the holes in the spools, all cause of me. the aiming sucked, but i was able to see when they were coming and snap shoot em.

[starboarder2001]

one time i was playing speedball and i slid into a bunker and the bunker started to fall i cought it and set it back up.:laugh:

[PMI_Guy]

....or the deadly collasping sup air bunker. i had just gotten to the rocket, when it starts deflating. being one of 5 left on our team, (it was 30 v 30 and they still ahd like 15 left)and the 5 of us being spread out (because we were playing full feild, about half a mile distance)i surrened. plus i was hot, we had been playing for like 45 minutes.

[Sunolplayerss]

I saw this one game...: Well I was tired so I sat behind the net watching a speedball game.
There were two newbs in bunkers about 2 ft from each other, both of then had no clue that the opposition was s close..lol. I called half the people at the staging area to come watch it..Well a friend of mine called me to watch it in the first place. About 2 mins. into the game they figured it out. The guy on my left started moving to bunker the guy on the right. Newb games at out field play by the bunkering rule, which mean u have to knock the bunker the other guy's in. This newb on the left sneaks over to the bunker then knocks so hard that the right guy's bunker fell over. Everyone at the staging area were laughing their butts off. Then both these guys just start to shoot each other up. Like half a hopperfull later the ref comes and stops them....Funny NEwbies...